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adrift05
USA
13 Posts |
 Posted - Feb 09 2009 : 9:02:11 PM
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Hi, I've been experiencing symptoms that seem to fit under kundalini awakening, and I've never known about it, until I started doing some research on my symptoms.
I know it isn't a medical problem because I feel fine so I thought it might be a spiritual problem.
I was just 'awakened' last week, and it has been so far both wonderful and terrible experience. I'm a student in college, and I need to focus on my studies, but this has made me lose concentration and I"m focusing more on what is happening to me. Please, I spoke to my parents, siblings, and a professor about it, but they don't seem to know what is going on with me.
What happened that led up to my 'awakening' just last week was it all started about 3 months ago when I became really hypersensitive to people's emotions, and felt a deep urgency to go out in nature, as well as to participate in my community more. My emotional state would often be high and full of elation, and then when alone, the tears stream down for unknown reason.
This phase continued up until last week when i started experiencing some sort of bliss where my body would convulse, shake, and there was a pleasant feeling overall, that is full of love and joy. I thought that would be it, but then this convulsion keeps happening dailly, and now, i've develop some sort of gasping condition, where i would involuntarily inhale air in to the max, one after another.
this seems to always happen when I'm outside, and I seemingly seem to be more hypersensitive to all the happenings outside in nature.
Please help, i'm trying to cope with all this, but it seems like i'm lost in a dream or just going insane. |
Edited by - AYPforum on Jun 10 2012 9:48:53 PM |
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tadeas
Czech Republic
314 Posts |
Posted - Feb 09 2009 : 10:09:23 PM
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Hi and welcome to the forum :)
You'll find many people here who've had similar experiences, maybe they'll share here or you can read more all over the forums :)
You're most probably not going insane, it's a pretty natural and beautiful process that is happening. Many people here have gone through it and many are going through it. The most important thing to do to stabilize yourself is to meditate (if you're not already doing that). Check lesson 13 for instructions - http://www.aypsite.org/13.html
There's a lot of great material to read and learn from on this website, so definitely see the lessons. Very helpful :)
Meditate and enjoy the journey. |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2009 : 04:40:25 AM
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Hi adrift, welcome to the forum
quote:
I was just 'awakened' last week, and it has been so far both wonderful and terrible experience. I'm a student in college, and I need to focus on my studies, but this has made me lose concentration and I"m focusing more on what is happening to me.
The important words for me here is concentration and focus.
Yes you need to be able to function properly and focus on your studies. Instead, from what you say, you are focusing on what is going on inside and this is distracting you.
The important thing then is to understand that what is going on is "normal" in the land of spirituality.
Once we understand this we can be less hooked on it and just let it happen as something normal in our lives. The more normal it becomes in our lives the more focus and concentration that can be given to other things, like study.
I appreciate too that it can be overwhelming, especially if you are picking up other's emotions etc. - is this difficult for you?
As tadeas says, it would probably be essential to do some stabilising practice in order to manage it properly in your life. These can be found in the Main Lessons here.
Can you tell us if you have a meditation or spiritual practice of any kind? |
Edited by - Sparkle on Feb 10 2009 04:41:37 AM |
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Shredder
USA
34 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2009 : 08:12:04 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by adrift05
Hi, I've been experiencing symptoms that seem to fit under kundalini awakening, and I've never known about it, until I started doing some research on my symptoms.
Hi and welcome Adrift05. You did not mention what path you follow. Do you practice yoga? If so what type and where are at in it? In general without knowing anything about you except what you have posted I would suggest grounding exersises, such as getting out and walking/hiking. You seem drawn to nature so something is already pulling you that way. So go with it......shredder |
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adrift05
USA
13 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2009 : 09:10:30 AM
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| I had meditated 3 years ago under the zen path for a few months and then stopped because I felt I wasn't getting much relaxation from it, because it was augmenting my thoughts and emotions. But about three months ago, past memories and zen experiences started breaking the surface and it seems to have accumulated to the condition that I am in now. I thought I was getting better yesterday after I meditated for a little bit, but just now, after catching sight of a photo of a news article on the killings going on in sri lanka, my breathing, and gasping just went uncontrollable up. Is this really something spiritually, or medical...i'm thinking about going to the shrink, because this is getting to be too overwhelming, emotionally. |
Edited by - adrift05 on Feb 10 2009 10:05:11 AM |
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2009 : 11:13:49 AM
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Hi Adrift05.....
Noone can know for sure what is happening to you, BUT, from everything you say I would put in an educated guess and say this is definitely spiritual. But if these symptoms are bothering you enough and you want some medical verification that it is not physical, then go to a doctor and get checked out. Personally I find doctors basically useless when it comes to stuff like this, but if it is for peace of mind that you can't seem to find without a medical checkup then by all means hit up the clinic! (or the shrink) I would not allow the shrink to put you on psych meds though, which they seem to want to do in just about ANY situation regardless of whether or not they understand what is happening.....(actually even MORE so when then don't know what is happening)
The main thing I want to stress though Adrift is that you are not alone and there are many of us who have gone through or are going through things exactly the same or at least very similar. A regular sadhana (meditation routine) WILL help to smooth things out, but you will also need to find just the right routine and the right amount of time to do it as you are already on the overload side and will need to actively self-pace. If you need any clarification on any of this please don't be afraid to ask.
Best of luck my friend.
Love,
Carson |
Edited by - CarsonZi on Feb 10 2009 11:15:10 AM |
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adrift05
USA
13 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2009 : 3:14:19 PM
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I went to my counselor this morning and from the characteristics i was exhibiting with my shortness in breath and tremors, he said that i might be having a panic attack. he actually helped stabilize my breathing by guiding me through taking each breath calmly. I don't think this is a panic attack, because i wasn't afraid of anything, but he said that the symptoms i'm experiencing might be triggered from a past memory as well as my fear of these symptoms continuing. In that sense, he's right, and i am trying to get a handle on all this, as well as juggle with school work and activities. i'm to meet him for a full session on Thursday.
I don't understand what is happening to me in the spiritual sense, and i want to, but i guess, from what Sparkle said, maybe i should just let it naturally flow. And i really am trying to, but how can i? the symptoms are getting worse. Just right now, something is pulling me on the tip of my toe and just wants to fly up in the air, but my body prevents me from doing it. What is going on? the only thing that i actually have been doing lately that's remotely in the spiritual realm was just enjoying myself by spinning around, doing imitations of whirling dervishes, dancing, and being in tune with nature. i never thought whatever i was doing would lead up to this and never imagined of having an experience like this. But yes, i'll definitely look into the sadhana meditation. Thanks everyone for your support and advice.
oh, and what's distracting me even more is that i've have a strong urge to think and write too darn much about the deeper meaning of life and things in general. how can i make this not interfere with my studies? |
Edited by - adrift05 on Feb 10 2009 3:24:04 PM |
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Sparkle
Ireland
1457 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2009 : 6:17:41 PM
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Hi Adrift
quote:
oh, and what's distracting me even more is that i've have a strong urge to think and write too darn much about the deeper meaning of life and things in general. how can i make this not interfere with my studies?
Very good to keep a journal if this is your inclination. It is often very theraputic to get things on paper, even if you never read it again
Shredder mentioned grounding and I'm wondering about
What sort of diet you have, if it is vegetarian and light for instance, it might be good to include some heavier foods.
Loads of walking or active sports.
If you can do it, a cold shower or bath daily.
Maybe others will have more suggestions
Also, the practice of present moment living, in Buddhism called mindfulness, can help focus your mind on what you are at in the present moment, so that all there is, is what is before you right now. When it is time for study, it is time for study and that's all.
When you drink tea, all you are doing is just simply drinking tea, with your full focus on that and only that, when your mind wanders gently bring it back. When out walking just look at each thing you see with full focus and when your attention shifts to something else bring your full focus to that.
This practive is very good for grounding - the only thing you might have to be careful of, is if your mind looses itself in the object you are focusing on and you loose the contact with the materiality of the object - you don't need that right now, in my opinion - but it probably won't happen.
When this is done in conjunction with Deep Meditation it is even more effective. But you might have to watch the effects of any meditation, just in case it brings you in deeper.
You will have to experiment and find what works for you, especially untill things settle down a bit.
I'm not saying don't meditate, just to be careful with whatever you do and actively monitor your body and feelings etc, to see how things are working and then modify accordingly.
Here we call this taking responsibility for your own practice - and once on this path your practice is your life basically, not just your meditation and formal practices.
That's why Yogani says the Guru is in You |
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karl
United Kingdom
1812 Posts |
Posted - Feb 11 2009 : 07:53:56 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by adrift05
I went to my counselor this morning and from the characteristics i was exhibiting with my shortness in breath and tremors, he said that i might be having a panic attack. he actually helped stabilize my breathing by guiding me through taking each breath calmly. I don't think this is a panic attack, because i wasn't afraid of anything, but he said that the symptoms i'm experiencing might be triggered from a past memory as well as my fear of these symptoms continuing. In that sense, he's right, and i am trying to get a handle on all this, as well as juggle with school work and activities. i'm to meet him for a full session on Thursday.
I don't understand what is happening to me in the spiritual sense, and i want to, but i guess, from what Sparkle said, maybe i should just let it naturally flow. And i really am trying to, but how can i? the symptoms are getting worse. Just right now, something is pulling me on the tip of my toe and just wants to fly up in the air, but my body prevents me from doing it. What is going on? the only thing that i actually have been doing lately that's remotely in the spiritual realm was just enjoying myself by spinning around, doing imitations of whirling dervishes, dancing, and being in tune with nature. i never thought whatever i was doing would lead up to this and never imagined of having an experience like this. But yes, i'll definitely look into the sadhana meditation. Thanks everyone for your support and advice.
oh, and what's distracting me even more is that i've have a strong urge to think and write too darn much about the deeper meaning of life and things in general. how can i make this not interfere with my studies?
I read these posts and can often see options which are outside of Yoga practise. Your symptoms seem very similar to those which come from panic attacks (in my teens I had the same type of symptoms and would go down to the beach just to try and get some air......they were caused by an impending marriage which my sub concious knew was not right for me.......once I decided to end the relationship the symptoms stopped abruptly.
Often we already know what it is that is causing these things, we just ignore our own sub concious minds that are trying to scream out a warning, when you dont listen to it it begins to up the anty and starts with panting and sleep disturbance and can go much further.
Sit down and shut your eyes, tell your sub concious you are listening and want to know what is causing the symptoms and start to listen.
If it is a past problem that has come up......usually a negative emotion that will emerge during the strangest times, then it needs dealing with. We supress a lot of negative emotions so we can function and neatly put them in a bag labeled "to deal with later". They often pop up and say "here I am can you deal with things now ?". We squash them back into the bag with the others and get on with living. Sometimes they get stronger in response to some stimulus and result in physical symptoms along the lines of what you are feeling.
I usually use Time Line Therapy for dealing with these structures and have a 100% success rate. Sometimes these emotions are based on such insignificant events that clients struggle to understand exactly why they have held on to the emotion for so long......typical can be having a rattle taken away as a baby, or being blamed for taking a sweet when it was unjustified. The emotions can hang around the event and added to further events along the timeline, it is like giant snowball based on little more than a minor event.
Old style therapy relied on getting the client to relive the event..........as doctor Mcoy said in Star Trek that is medieval in approach.........why make a client go through something that was awful the first time around. Timeline therapy is used extensively with great results in Post traumatic Stree Disorders and I would recommend a breakthrough session from a good therapist that uses this modern approach and also back that up with advice from the experienced people on the forum. |
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adrift05
USA
13 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2009 : 09:46:20 AM
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I went to see the doctor, got a ct scan, blood test, and chest xray done, and it all came out to be normal. he prescribed me clonopin for my spasms, but i haven't taken it yet.
I thought everything would get better, but it's not. My chest still heaves up and down, and my spine at random times wants to force itself straight up, arching and tilting my head back. i feel as if there is so much vibration and energy running through me, my legs and arms involuntary moves- spin and sway.
I don't know what is happening, and i have tried to meditate, but the last time i did that, it felt like something was taking over my body and prostrating.
aahh, i don't know what to do anymore, i'm getting terrified and no one around me understands what's happening to me.
please help, how do i go about normally again? |
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Richard
United Kingdom
857 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2009 : 10:26:39 AM
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Hi adrift welcome to the forum.
This does sound like a kundalini awakening I think its best to let things calm down before you do any spiritual practices at all. Grounding is required and the best thing for that is physical activities,walking is great for this and so is eating heavy stodgy foods the sort of things diaticians tell you are realy bad for you
when you feel a bit calmer and feel you are ready have a go at Spinal Breathing see Here this can be very balancing. I was once a long time ago in a similar situation, not so extreme as yours and mine was brought about by bad meditation techniques.
In my case spinal breathing sorted it all out but don't try anything except grounding until you feel calmer and ready.
Hope this helps you
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cosmic_troll
USA
229 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2009 : 8:54:34 PM
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Hi adrift,
If you're healthy enough for it, strenuous exercise can be very grounding. Particularly, squats with your feet planted firmly on the ground. Or "horse stance" type of kung-fu posture. Lifting weights and running are also good.
Most importantly, try not to panic. It may be uncomfortable for a bit, but your symptoms should eventually calm down.
It's also a good idea to see a doctor or therapist. Sounds like there could be an anxiety component to it. (I used to have anxiety - it's not necessarily triggered by an apparent cause in daily life).
Hope you find a solution!
Peace
cosmic |
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adrift05
USA
13 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2009 : 09:45:46 AM
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I found the solution to my involuntary movements. When they start to occur, let it take hold, and dance to its flow. I did and it was simply amazing. The manifestations just show that the energy/spirit inside of you wants to reveal to you a beautiful secret.
Thank-you for all your help and much love,
adrift05 |
Edited by - adrift05 on Mar 09 2009 09:52:33 AM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4382 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2009 : 11:10:52 AM
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Hi Adrift,
welcome to the forum
Thanks for sharing here. If you want to get a handle on some of the things that are happening for you, it all sounds very much like kundalini to me. The breathing problems can be caused by the heart chakra opening. The way you responded to the visual images of people in pain is a typical heart chakra response. The heart chakra is very sympathetic and responds to other's suffering.
The shaking, fits and spasms are typical of kundalini in it's early stages. The bodily movements are called automatic kriyas and can go on for a long time, so don't expect anything to clear up overnight. As you have found, not resisting the movements helps. It is normal for the movements to get more intense and wild whenever you center and calm yourself, and especially if you become elated by feelings of love or by a sense of the Divine (infinate mind). The automatic kriyas can also get a lot stronger during sex.
You should find that it all gets much easier to handle over time, and will settle down. It is part of a much bigger transformation which is taking you towards enlightenment.
Good luck
Christi
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