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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 20 2014 : 10:18:28 AM
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Hello everyone,
Recently, I have set a small intention towards non-harming. I'm just using the "gently favoring" principle from AYP. Instead of judging myself as wrong, I'm just noticing and a small layer of judgement has disappeared. Oh and I'm actually remembering to take my own bags to the grocery store! |
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American Baba
USA
48 Posts |
Posted - Mar 20 2014 : 10:30:40 PM
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| Sounds like you are off to an excellent start. I would be interested in learning about how it progresses over time. |
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Apr 01 2014 : 12:46:44 PM
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Well, this is not going as planned. It's to the point of being almost comical. I was thinking about the environment and self-care when I set the intention. What's happening is repeated conflict. I'm buying a house, and it's not going well. I'm passive by nature and avoid conflict, but I feel like I'm being forced to speak up.
So for now, it's non-harming in speech when you have been lied to. It gets tricky. I'm not feeling the least bit spiritual. |
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kami
USA
920 Posts |
Posted - Apr 01 2014 : 1:21:31 PM
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Dear Lalow,
What does "non-harming" mean to you? I'm curious.
Thanks and love.   |
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Apr 01 2014 : 2:00:30 PM
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I do not have a clear definition. What was behind the intention was a small step towards action. I'm often plagued by inertia, so this was a very simple way to direct me towards action.
I guess there's something to this. I've been forced to action over and over again. Just not in the way I would have chosen.
kami, how did you know to ask the right question? |
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kami
USA
920 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2014 : 10:24:44 AM
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Hi Lalow,
Didn't know  .
Non-harming, or ahimsa, although the first tenet of yamas, is indeed hard to follow. Ultimately, it is nothing but stillness in action (the key word being "ultimately", since it does not always start out that way).. We often think of non-harming in mostly physical terms as in shunning violence toward ourselves and other beings. And that is a great place to begin with. But the experience of ahimsa actually shifts drastically with continued cultivation of inner silence and growing awareness. It then begins to expand to our thoughts and intentions, becoming more and more upstream. In my own path, it began with becoming vegan - I thought at the time years ago that shunning animal products was a form of ahimsa. But then, I began to become aware of my judgments "against" meat-eaters. The same judgment was meted out against myself in the form of guilt if I happened to consume dairy or other animal products by chance. All in all, there was a righteous indignation about this new "thing" I had taken up. In reality, I was violating the principle of ahimsa, probably much more than those who ate meat and did not have such divisive judgments. It was only when those judgments were dropped that the discordance felt deeply between thought, emotion and action resolved.
Ahimsa also presents itself in ways that do not seem so at first glance, for example, when disciplining children. It is needed at times, and the practice is to stay present and the punishment/discipline be balanced between fairness and kindness, with the broad goal of wanting them to learn from the experience. If I stubbornly attach a meaning to ahimsa being "no forceful action at all, no matter what", that is once again, himsa arising from stubbornness and inability to do what is called for. Ahimsa is, finally, about loosening up, becoming pliant and flexible, with no polarized and fixed views and actions.. Loving-kindness (and from it, ahimsa) arises spontaneously when we start letting go of me and mine.
When you say you have been forced to action, what do you mean by that? Is it that you did not want to act? Can you give an example?
Much love. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2014 : 12:55:56 AM
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I would recommend starting with something less global such as the environment, start with something small like non-judgement of others 
I am grinning because I fail constantly at this deceptively simple matter.
Sey |
Edited by - SeySorciere on Apr 03 2014 12:57:50 AM |
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Anima
484 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2014 : 09:55:08 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by kami
All in all, there was a righteous indignation about this new "thing" I had taken up. In reality, I was violating the principle of ahimsa, probably much more than those who ate meat and did not have such divisive judgments. It was only when those judgments were dropped that the discordance felt deeply between thought, emotion and action resolved.
I can relate to this very much. Discord and conflict is one thing I try to restrain. But as an expression of Nature, it exists, and I also must sometimes accept that I cannot tie back the River. So even dropping the attachment to restraint can be seen as a unifying and non-injurious expression. I don't really view such actions (or knowledge/understanding/stillness in action)as accomplishments for myself, but then again, part of me wants to take ALL the credit! More credit than is possible, in fact.
quote:
Originally posted by kami
Ahimsa also presents itself in ways that do not seem so at first glance, for example, when disciplining children. It is needed at times, and the practice is to stay present and the punishment/discipline be balanced between fairness and kindness, with the broad goal of wanting them to learn from the experience. If I stubbornly attach a meaning to ahimsa being "no forceful action at all, no matter what", that is once again, himsa arising from stubbornness and inability to do what is called for.
Thank you, Kami. I kind of relate this to my struggles with inner dialog and my words. Sometimes I bicker with desires, thoughts, aspirations, delusions, and attachments (as in daily) and often cannot be afraid to tell myself the truth of what I need. Sometimes that produces statements and questions for others that are difficult for us to accept. I prefer to be gentle in all matters, but then again, come what may. I often cannot be afraid to refrain from conflict, to engage in conflict, to espouse unity or espouse division, at least with myself. I guess it's very hard for me to be attached or rigid in my conception of myself or anything. And finding some structure for that little brat of me is something I am trying to embrace without obsession. I have faith that it will be guided in the right way.
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2014 : 10:57:25 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by kami
When you say you have been forced to action, what do you mean by that? Is it that you did not want to act? Can you give an example?
I told my real estate agent that I felt she was doing a poor job of representing me. That's how I felt, and I couldn't just let it go. The problem is she's a really nice lady! I did not want to hurt her feelings, but I felt that I had to speak up. |
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2014 : 11:21:45 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by SeySorciere
I would recommend starting with something less global such as the environment, start with something small like non-judgement of others
I am grinning because I fail constantly at this deceptively simple matter.
Sey
I can't even go there! Judgement feels instantaneous upon seeing/meeting people. I just dish out boxes to put people in. It feels like it is pre-thought and could depend on what mood I'm in. There seems to only be a gap with babies. It takes longer to label them. |
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kami
USA
920 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2014 : 6:54:13 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Anima Deorum
Discord and conflict is one thing I try to restrain. But as an expression of Nature, it exists, and I also must sometimes accept that I cannot tie back the River. So even dropping the attachment to restraint can be seen as a unifying and non-injurious expression.
I kind of relate this to my struggles with inner dialog and my words. Sometimes I bicker with desires, thoughts, aspirations, delusions, and attachments (as in daily) and often cannot be afraid to tell myself the truth of what I need. Sometimes that produces statements and questions for others that are difficult for us to accept. I prefer to be gentle in all matters, but then again, come what may. I often cannot be afraid to refrain from conflict, to engage in conflict, to espouse unity or espouse division, at least with myself. I guess it's very hard for me to be attached or rigid in my conception of myself or anything. And finding some structure for that little brat of me is something I am trying to embrace without obsession. I have faith that it will be guided in the right way.
Hi Anima,
That is really a deep, beautiful and honest look into the matter. Thank you.
That is exactly it - becoming aware of the conflict within will initially ease the need to put the cause and blame for it "out there". But self-honesty is not always immediately accompanied by self-compassion and non-harm. This is because we are deeply conditioned to shame, guilt and self-pity.. Particularly if that has been fostered by being raised in cultures with strong beliefs in sin and hell and the like. When self-honesty precedes self-compassion, the path of yoga becomes painful - to look at our perceived shortcomings is no fun.
But then, with continued practices and growing inner silence, we learn to let go of such harsh judgments about our own inner conflicts and struggles. Further still, every thought, comparison, judgment, critique is let go of as and when it arises, not as a willful thing to do but as a natural evolution of gently favoring awareness. Identifying with thought/conflict feels like being stuffed into a jar; the sense of contraction is thus clearly known. Simply favoring being open awareness feels natural, innocent. Nonharming happens in spontaneous action, not in constant evaluation by thought of whether or not every specific action causes harm..
Not sure if that makes sense, but yes, it will be guided perfectly.
Love. |
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kami
USA
920 Posts |
Posted - Apr 03 2014 : 9:57:13 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by lalow33
quote:
Originally posted by kami
When you say you have been forced to action, what do you mean by that? Is it that you did not want to act? Can you give an example?
I told my real estate agent that I felt she was doing a poor job of representing me. That's how I felt, and I couldn't just let it go. The problem is she's a really nice lady! I did not want to hurt her feelings, but I felt that I had to speak up.
Hi Lalow,
That sounds like you dealt with the situation with honesty, courage and conviction with the intent of nonharming.
Letting things go does not mean not acting; nor does nonharming refer to inaction..
Say you decided not to say anything to your agent. From feeling and knowing she was not representing you well, would you buy/sell through her? Wouldn't you continue to waste her time when she could be representing someone else and acquiring more business? Is that nonharming? What about the conflict between your feelings/thoughts/actions - isn't that going against the grain of nonharming for yourself? Certainly ahimsa does not mean anxiety or fear of acting (and in doing so, fear of hurting someone).. Actually, it comes from the ability to intuitively know to do what is best for the whole, even when it doesn't seem like in on the surface. The classic example of this is a surgeon slashing open someone's body - seems pretty savage, but the intent and action arising from it are rooted in nonharming, strongly emphasized in the Hippocratic oath
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Anima
484 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2014 : 07:17:13 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by kami
But self-honesty is not always immediately accompanied by self-compassion and non-harm. This is because we are deeply conditioned to shame, guilt and self-pity.. Particularly if that has been fostered by being raised in cultures with strong beliefs in sin and hell and the like. When self-honesty precedes self-compassion, the path of yoga becomes painful - to look at our perceived shortcomings is no fun.
But then, with continued practices and growing inner silence, we learn to let go of such harsh judgments about our own inner conflicts and struggles. Further still, every thought, comparison, judgment, critique is let go of as and when it arises, not as a willful thing to do but as a natural evolution of gently favoring awareness. Identifying with thought/conflict feels like being stuffed into a jar; the sense of contraction is thus clearly known. Simply favoring being open awareness feels natural, innocent. Nonharming happens in spontaneous action, not in constant evaluation by thought of whether or not every specific action causes harm..
Not sure if that makes sense, but yes, it will be guided perfectly.
Love.
Yes, this makes very good sense. Thanks.
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ak33
Canada
229 Posts |
Posted - Apr 04 2014 : 8:05:44 PM
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| I totally agree with kami. Ahimsa comes from both having an intent of non-harming and a knowing of what is best for the situation as a whole. In your particular situation, my take on ahimsa would be to say nothing to her that would harm her feelings, but find another agent since it is YOU that has the problem. Just my take on it, and nothing else. |
Edited by - ak33 on Apr 04 2014 9:06:52 PM |
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lalow33
USA
966 Posts |
Posted - Apr 24 2014 : 09:57:33 AM
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| I recently realized that I'm part of nature. Not sure how I didn't know this.(Duh!). An intention not to harm no longer makes any sense to me. Good/bad and right/wrong concepts are not applicable for the time being. |
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Non-harming
