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anthony574
USA
549 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 20 2007 : 11:42:09 AM
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Hey everyone.
Here's the deal. A week ago I was actually really starting to feel some things from practice. I've been doing AYP for 4 months and I was feeling the beginnings of ecstacy and very high bhakti.
Problem is, I missed two night practices. Sometimes I don't get to it till it's too late and there's almost no point in doing AYP when you're sleepy and your mind is jello. I also went to a concert that was waaay too loud and I was around a lot of cigarettes. I feel like this somehow damaged me as now I feel "disconnected" with low energy and my bhakti is suffering.
I have been trying to restablish my routine, but it bothers me that something like that might have the ability to disconnect me like that. It's really not pleasant, I feel like something is missing or like I'm back to regular old me. I know there is flaw in that thinking, but that's how it is regardless of whether I know its right or wrong. |
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Kyman
530 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2007 : 12:35:48 PM
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Completely normal.
The cycles of purification, which are most vividly felt on the waves of bhakti, have a back and forth feeling at first. We have strong emotions around being on our chosen path and living up to our goals and principles. Our degree of bhakti at the time of low energy is most likely the only difference between a dark night of the soul and having a pizza and beer.
It is very comfortable, meditating, doing yoga. The sensations, feelings, emotions, can be very fulfilling. Pleasure in every color of the spectrum. So when they aren't there, we have only our love and devotion to see us through to the next phase. And things always get more interesting at the next phase.
Probably the biggest pain of the down cycle is the tendency for the mind to create more negative thoughts, and if the identity or ego is still active, it just thinks away. If you are accustomed to being positive with yourself though, the ego will manifest itself in a more functional way. So just enjoy the down cycle, briefly revisit your old self/selves, stay in touch. But make a definite goal to get back to practice as soon as you feel is best.
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Edited by - Kyman on Jul 20 2007 1:01:54 PM |
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maverick_21
Canada
11 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2007 : 12:51:00 PM
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In my opinion you have to be flexible with yourself and your practises if you intend to make this a lifelong process. We all know there will be times when we are forced to miss our practises. I have found that if I am obsessive or compulsive about trying to incorporate any habit into my daily routine it is rarely productive.
I highly doubt that you undid four months of intense inner cleansing by missing two practises. I have to miss practises all the time but I know I'm moving forward. Your feeling of disconnectedness is likely a placebo effect. |
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yogibear
409 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2007 : 1:08:27 PM
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Be like teflon when it comes to the past, Anthony. Don't get stuck in it.
You missed a practice? No sweat. Just pick up where you left off. Non-stick.
"A thousand times to fall, a thousand times to rise."
"Follow the rules gracefully, break the rules gracefully."
"Just keep favoring the practice."
Eventually, if you use persistant "gentle persuasion," you won't be able to help yourself. You will have to meditate. Just like someone has to smoke. Force of habit, neuroplasticity will take over.
Best, yb. |
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anthony574
USA
549 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2007 : 3:58:24 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Kyman
Completely normal.
The cycles of purification, which are most vividly felt on the waves of bhakti, have a back and forth feeling at first. We have strong emotions around being on our chosen path and living up to our goals and principles. Our degree of bhakti at the time of low energy is most likely the only difference between a dark night of the soul and having a pizza and beer.
It is very comfortable, meditating, doing yoga. The sensations, feelings, emotions, can be very fulfilling. Pleasure in every color of the spectrum. So when they aren't there, we have only our love and devotion to see us through to the next phase. And things always get more interesting at the next phase.
Probably the biggest pain of the down cycle is the tendency for the mind to create more negative thoughts, and if the identity or ego is still active, it just thinks away. If you are accustomed to being positive with yourself though, the ego will manifest itself in a more functional way. So just enjoy the down cycle, briefly revisit your old self/selves, stay in touch. But make a definite goal to get back to practice as soon as you feel is best.
wow, you really hit it on the head there.
that is the problem. during this downtime my mind seems to be creating negative thoughts and trying to undermine my bhakti...making me think yoga is dumb, its escapism, blah blah blah |
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Kyman
530 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2007 : 4:56:54 PM
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It's unavoidable, I feel. During these times you have only your ability to stay centered.
It is easy for me to stick my foot in my mouth during those times of low energy, so I find it is best to say little or nothing. A corollary, find the delicate balance between action and non action.
You can refuse to dignify a comment with a reply, and so you can refuse to dignify a thought with a counter thought. Just view the thoughts in the context of phenomena, instead of the seeds for more thoughts.
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Edited by - Kyman on Jul 20 2007 5:24:46 PM |
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salvation
19 Posts |
Posted - Jul 21 2007 : 01:50:37 AM
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Hi anthony
They all gave good suggestions.Whenever you feel doubts about the yoga practices or some guilt that you missed your practices,just try to give some thought to yourself....
are you the same person as before starting these practices?Haven't you derived so much benefit from these?
Whenever I miss my practices,I don't have any guilt but just feel once that I missed some more benefit for that day and I prepare for the next session...
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Missing practices :-(
