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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 02 2016 : 9:47:36 PM
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Yes!  |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2016 : 02:01:49 AM
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Thank you Bodhi,
I also believe it is the sharing and personal stories that keep people inspired and visiting this website regularly - and of course, a good debate now and again. Else people come just for the techniques, they may ask clarification in an odd post here and there, but after that they are "gone". Unfortunately, especially years ago when I first joined, we were too often hit with the "It is scenery - do not dwell on it" which effectively silenced those trying to share or asking reassurance. It discouraged sharing and participation. With your abundant sharing, it will hopefully get others to share as well.
Sey  |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2016 : 10:52:10 AM
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Good point, Sey. The scenery (inner and outer) is directly influenced by the rise of inner silence, yes? So, the details are relevant to the eternal foundation we are cultivating and surrendering to.
But as I mentioned to Beehive, I'm not meaning to convey that anyone is deficient or lacking if they are not inclined to share personal stories. That's just my style and calling. Obviously, there can be too much of anything, including an obsession with one's own personal story (suffering), so I have to pull it back sometimes and favor the third-person perspective (he, she, it) a little more. I've read some of my past writing, and it's had a gag-me-with-a-spoon effect, which inevitably brings me to the conclusion: OK, time to trim down my indulgent language a little.
In any case, you're a terrific writer, Sey, and I always enjoy reading your creations, as simple or elaborate as they may be.  |
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kumar ul islam
United Kingdom
791 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2016 : 4:16:55 PM
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| i wonder where gag me with a spoon term comes from ? |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 03 2016 : 4:43:16 PM
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Apparently, a Frank Zappa song popularized the phrase, which was part of California "Valleyspeak", per Wikipedia.  |
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Dennis
USA
83 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2016 : 02:49:58 AM
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Bodhi,
I can't speak for the others but I enjoy reading your posts, the longer the better.
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Beehive
USA
117 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2016 : 07:16:21 AM
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I think that's perfectly natural, and it's happened to me quite a few times.
For me, it's worth the risk of sounding a little absurd, or silly, or even obnoxious, because the process of sharing is also one of self-inquiry. When self-inquiry is bounced off another person, or group, I think it becomes realer, especially in conversation and intimate settings. On that note, this forum will never replace personal interaction and physical closeness, but that doesn't mean that the forum can't be a nice supplement to, and enabler of, the real deal. I've been fortunate enough to meet several people who have posted on the forum, and I have found that a single day of face-to-face time is worth 100 days of virtual chat or exchanges.
While I think Yogani's position of anonymity is a brilliant move that I support 100%, it also leaves a lot of room for practitioners to pick up the slack. Time will tell if the glue of desire and stillness in action will bring us together in a more coherent, lasting way. As it is now, it's quite tenuous, displaced, and fragile. But that is also very natural due to AYP being very young in its development, so I'm very optimistic about our chances to rise as a formidable, influential presence in the world.
Of course, there are probably thousands of AYP practitioners that never touch the forum, and are still benefiting from the practices, so this is just a fraction of what's going on. Nevertheless, if the scattered devotees can congeal and collaborate, based on independent inclinations, connections, and localities, then it will get better and better. And that's the great part of Yogani's hands-off approach—no one needs permission or supervision to join together and practice AYP. It's open-source.
Sorry, that was a long tangent, but going back to your inner process of sharing, I would just encourage you to follow your inner guru, and if that means doing more reading than writing, so be it! In any case, I really do appreciate your feedback to my writing, and your unique perspective really boosts my bandwidth of ecstatic bliss, so I won't ever be trying to repress or suppress you, for what it's worth. I'll just be asking for more of your lovely words, as well as others (Charliedog, Sunyata, Dogboy, Lalow, Sey, BlueRC, Kumar, Maheswari, Omsat, Blanche, etc.) 
One more thing about writing on the forum. Though I said face-to-face interaction is much preferred, there is still an advantage to writing and reading each other across long distances, because it gives plenty of room for solitude and reflection, without the pressure of having to respond in a knee-jerk fashion. There is great joy in taking one's time and crafting these little messages, as well as absorbing the ones that are received. So, I see it as a win-win situation, really. The best of both worlds.
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Beehive
USA
117 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2016 : 10:33:14 AM
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| This is another reason not to post - I obviously deleted the quotation marks from that last post .... I hope mind reading is part of your tool bag Bodhi. |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2016 : 10:59:33 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Dennis
Bodhi,
I can't speak for the others but I enjoy reading your posts, the longer the better.
Sweet! Much appreciated, Dennis. The recovery blogs have been a lot of fun, so it's good to hear from you that they're not too lengthy. 
quote:
Originally posted by Beehive
This is another reason not to post - I obviously deleted the quotation marks from that last post .... I hope mind reading is part of your tool bag Bodhi.
Just another opportunity to transcend identity and relinquish pride of authorship! Good times. |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 04 2016 : 3:00:01 PM
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@Beehive
quote:
But I don't like to write on the forums myself. I try to now and then - sometimes out of felling obligated to contribute because I've received so much. Most often I spend way too much time after I've hit "POST" worrying that I've written it wrong or not described an experience the way it actually felt to me. It's not a pleasant feeling!
That happens to me too Beehive, sometimes I remove them, but on the other hand, the writing comes from the heart, the worries afterwards from the thinking mind, observing that helps me. |
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Beehive
USA
117 Posts |
Posted - Mar 05 2016 : 9:43:04 PM
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| Very very good point Charliedog. |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2016 : 10:58:13 PM
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Watching the sunset on my uncle's dock on the Gulf of Mexico, I find it funny that the sun is most colorful right before it disappears. Just for a brief window, the burning star reveals itself directly in a friendly bow before observant eyes. The rest of the time above the horizon, it's too bright and searing to gaze upon. But it fades with a purple-orangle glow that drapes the west like a slow-drawn curtain on the global stage.
Right now, there are clouds clinging to the horizontal line, catching the remnants of radiance left behind. I, too, inhale the radiance through my third eye, so my heart can drink the pure energy of solar sustenance.
. . .
It is dark now. Many stars are out. The major constellations are surrounded by other stars (and perhaps galaxies) that I don't normally see. It's like looking up at a cosmic beach in which the sand is made of interstellar jewels, and the ocean is space itself.
My young cousin is drunk and sitting on the dock with me. I ask him: "What would Paradise be to you?" He says: "It would be getting everything I want, and the world revolving 100% around me." I start cackling at his audacious honesty and pat him on the back. The ego is the vehicle of enlightenment, after all.
. . .
I am lying in bed, contempating. My mind is like a treasure chest without limit. I am aware of the boundless potential, and I am aware of my limitations. I am aware of my purity, and my dirtiness.
I peruse an email on my phone from my grandmother. She says I shouldn't mention anything detrimental about my twin brother in my blog. I assure her that I'm playing my cards with finesse, and there is no need to worry.
Our English bull dog Snuggles is barking for no apparent reason. I rub her back to calm her down. Soon enough, she is snoring at a high decibel level. It sounds like a rhythmic machine gun is firing through her nostrils.
I'm waiting until midnight, when we will launch the boat once the tide is high enough.
High tides...low tides...
They tell me it's the pull of the moon. |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2016 : 11:18:42 PM
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Fun little game...if I take the first word of each line from the above entry and string them together in exact order as a makeshift poem (adding only a little punctuation, capitalization, and line breaks for cadence) here's what comes out:
Watching most directly...bright,
Like right-left energy
It, perhaps sand
My, to me, enlightenment!
I, boundless dirtiness
I, detrimental finesse
Our down gun
I'm high
They. |
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Dogboy
USA
2201 Posts |
Posted - Mar 07 2016 : 8:26:47 PM
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U R A
Beat at heart
Bodhi
a beating heart  |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 08 2016 : 11:15:08 PM
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| Thanks for playing along, Dogboy. |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 09 2016 : 11:52:15 PM
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Glimmers of hope intermingle with deep inhalations and exhalations, revealing vistas of inner space. The physical world sparkles with a holographic clarity. All is seen as a reflection of self.
The details of her face, her eyes, the shape of her hair tied in a ponytail—these granularities are perfectly familiar, yet a freshness and constantly regenerating newness radiates from her presence.
I take my sandals off and walk across the carpet in the office. My naked feet celebrate the touch of their soles to the synthetic ground.
On the phone I talk to an RN who I discover was a former high school classmate. The smallness of the world once again becomes apparent.
I close my eyes and put my awareness in my spine. Hints of green, purple, gold and red sparkle in the emptiness.
I cannot fail. To become the field of Being is certain, perhaps because it is only a matter of discovering that I have always been so. |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 10 2016 : 12:37:58 AM
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| Love this |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 10 2016 : 02:02:18 AM
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| Love you |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 17 2016 : 11:24:49 PM
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Thursday Night Vignettes
The fighter within me responds with rage to the shadows of doubt that cloud my mind. The belief in the supernormal is so strong that acceptance of a "no" answer seems completely improbable, if not impossible. The pain of uncertainty is dwarfed only by glimmers of hope and beauty that penetrate the darkness.
...
There are different kinds of smiles. Some are barely noticeable on the outside, but inside, the happiness is stretching widely. Some are plastic and contrived, straining to save face, or to perpetuate an image of nicety. Some are wickedly mischievous and intelligent. Then, there are those that are full, overflowing, and boundlessly echoing the inner sentiments across the outer plane.
...
I edit thoroughly. I take my time with each word. I trust the pace of the impulse to write. There is a thread—an invisible string, if you will—that is sewing it all together...weaving the tapestry, so to speak. When I reflect upon the continuity therein, I realize: I am the thread.
You cannot pin that thread down, cannot destroy it. You cannot capture the wild and refined animal that is roaming the fields of the interior.
To what degree, to what extent, can the noble beast be manifested? That is the question. That is what everybody is waiting for, whether they admit it or not. Well, maybe some are waiting for a long rest, a peaceful sleep, a relief from everything. That also has its time.
We have sharp claws that pierce flesh easily, fangs that bite ferociously, bullets that hit obstructions at lightning speed. What predators we can be.
We have the softest of fur, the gentlest of voices, the meekest of movements in the ballet dance of our unchoreographed show. Tender is the warmth of love.
...
Thump thump thump thump—the beating of the rabbit foot on the grassy ground!
Huff huff huff huff—the pulsing breath of the exuberant heart!
Ah! Oh! Ew! Mmmmmmmm!—orgasmic moans coming forth from palpitating touch!
Arghhh!—the tightening of the tremendously strong jaw whose appetite is insatiable!
Howling, howling, howling...as wolves speaking to the distant, lunar companion that looks down luminescently upon the evolution experiment unfolding below.
Now we have passed through the envelope of the atmosphere and found outer space to be lacking air, unfriendly to the human body. How will we breathe without the help of our mechanical prosthetics and chemical combustion?
Ahhhh...must be a sign to turn inward to stillness, where the body's vulnerability is a non-issue, and where breath can be suspended, perhaps long enough to complete the mission. And does that inner space hold the future of the cosmonaut? |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 18 2016 : 07:43:30 AM
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quote:
There are different kinds of smiles. Some are barely noticeable on the outside, but inside, the happiness is stretching widely. Some are plastic and contrived, straining to save face, or to perpetuate an image of nicety. Some are wickedly mischievous and intelligent. Then, there are those that are full, overflowing, and boundlessly echoing the inner sentiments across the outer plane.
    (could not resist )
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 18 2016 : 1:52:59 PM
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| My sentiments exactly. Well played, Charlie-D! |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2016 : 9:35:04 PM
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Stream-of-consciousness on another Thursday evening, Round 223:
Inside, I pine away for silence and pure will. Here is the silence, working through my fingers. Here is the pure will, rolling out the carpet of Being.
Stretching forward, I see time flowing perfectly, like a river running through a class of marvelously cut rapids. Stretching backward, I see space: an empty, open hand cradling marbles of movement that frolic whimsically to and fro.
Every moment is a bend in the curvature. Every doubt and fear is a squirming of the pubescent worm that inches its way to the surface of the dirt, perhaps to breathe more eternal air.
Beauty is a 360-degree phenomenon when the panorama of perception sweeps across the boundless field of awareness.
She shows me a GoPro video of her sister skydiving.
She uses a paper cutter to trim the edges of invitations to a baby shower.
He fetches food from a nearby Mexican restaurant and brings back the orders.
He asks me: "What's crack-a-lackin?"
I say: "Living the dream."
We all oscillate between interior and exterior, and I wonder, where is the line dividing the two? Is it the skin of the body, the perimeter of the aura, the difference between spoken and unspoken words?
The incessant drive to merge with everything and everyone tortures me, motivates me, liberates me. If I was a whale, I would swallow minnows by the millions. If I was a shark, I would sink my teeth into every piece of prey I could target. If I was the ocean itself, I would wrap my water around the bosom of the Earth and flood my element into outer space until I touched the moon. |
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kumar ul islam
United Kingdom
791 Posts |
Posted - Mar 25 2016 : 08:22:40 AM
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2016 : 02:58:32 AM
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| Can not help it, just these writings |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2016 : 11:29:39 PM
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| Kumar Charliedog |
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Journal of a Disgruntled Mystic
