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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Jan 27 2013 :  1:20:33 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
This is my kundalini experience from the past tense because the worst is over. For 3 years (2010, 2011, 2012) it was extremely uncomfortable at best and near frantic desperation at worst. Doing some fine tuning now and beginning to reap the benefits of this extraordinary experience. Had I known what was going on, it would have been more bearable. But I didn't have much of a clue. I knew very little about kundalini at the time.

Some successful strategies employed to cope with the spontaneous kundalini activation:

In the beginning, what probably helped me the most is those bi-metal bracelets, many of them made in India, or the magnetic type, readily available in the USA. Both types are very helpful in leveling out the energy surges and thus provide some temporary relief. For months I wore them day and night, only removing them to shower.

Personally I found crystals useful as well, but they aren't as easy to use as the bracelets and require experience and knowledge to employ effectively for this purpose. Nevertheless, they do work imo. Actually I was trying just about everything to see what would produce positive results.

Whereas I ordinarily practice Tai Chi and the result is enormously uplifting, that had to be self-paced and reduced. Most other types of exercise I found generally helpful in giving brief periods of respite. And sometimes Tai Chi helped. But other times it sent my energy through the roof. Calm and serenity is what I was aiming for, less energy not more. And I wanted no intensity in any part of my life. Intensity is what I wanted to get away from.

A comment here regarding family obligations. After much sifting and sorting from my memory trying to figure out how this kundalini activation got started, I realized that taking care of my father helped immensely to calm down the energy surges. It helped so much that I didn't have a problem at all. I took care of my father from 1996-2008. And from what I can ascertain the k activation began in 2000. It gradually kicked into high gear 4 years ago in January 2010 and until that time had been barely noticeable. But nothing about it seemed gradual once it really revved up.

During the intense activation phase, I was intuitively guided to try a heavier diet, higher in protein than my normal intake. Even though I am vata, and beans are not recommended for vata, I found that beans helped to promote a sense of well being, and I was eating more of them. Also eggs. And fish. I actually had to reduce my cheese consumption and for short periods like during the summer, gave it up entirely. I am mostly vegetarian, but found that I needed the fish. Any kind of protein I could get into my body seemed to help me feel better. Protein foods are generally heavier foods and that was what I required.

Lately as the kundalini activation began to ramp down, I have been consuming less protein, and have increased my intake of fresh juices which I juice myself. However, I notice that the juice (much lighter than most protein rich foods) usually increases my energy. Something I wouldn't have wanted to do until recently.

After being a year into this kundalini awakening, I was getting the idea that it really might just BE a kundalini thing (I didn't know for sure). I couldn't find any useful information online. What I did find was contradictory and didn't resonate. So I was basically on my own out in the middle of nowhere and I was very confused and lost. Needless to say I was relying on trial and error. After a lot of experimenting I discovered that going with the weird energy and being present with it was really all I could do. Fighting it or any kind of struggle whatsoever made it worse, sometimes so much worse that I cried for hours, or felt like my life was hopeless.

This is very important....when I learned to cooperate and work with the energy, it was so much easier. I would strongly recommend to do whatever possible to work with it. But at the same time, not to feed the energy or drive it more crazy than it already is. It takes some time to figure this out. Try to be patient with the process as it works itself out. You may need to do whatever you can to assist the process to stabilize, even out and level off. Most of the time, your goal will probably be to reduce rather than increase the spiritual component of the energy. I realize this may be counter-intuitive but it makes sense. It is our spiritual endeavors that drive the kundalini. So reducing and self-pacing anything with a spiritual component to it, may help limit and contain the k energy fluctuations and symptoms.

That was the hardest part for me. I somehow sensed that I had to back off from my spiritual endeavors, which for me, were rather obsessive. I almost completely stopped reading spiritual materials, which had become quite the indulgence. It was an indulgence I could no longer afford, at least not in the fever pitch kundalini stage. I even reduced the time I spent listening to spiritual music, which had always calmed and soothed me. In fact a lot of what I was doing was simply the opposite of what I normally did.

If I had known what was happening to me, I would have been able to take a more informed approach. As it was, I turned to the process itself for guidance, which was just as well. The process itself became my teacher and I have learned to respect her. It's virtually impossible to go through this experience without gaining some respect for the energy that has been driving you near crazy and from time to time, providing some bliss and ecstasy. It is referred to in these forums as the ecstatic conductivity.



maheswari

Lebanon
2516 Posts

Posted - Jan 27 2013 :  3:01:31 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
thank u for sharing parvati9
the experience of many of us resonate with yr experience

Edited by - maheswari on Jan 27 2013 3:01:53 PM
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AumNaturel

Canada
687 Posts

Posted - Jan 27 2013 :  6:40:10 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
thanks for your account parvati
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digofarias

Brazil
63 Posts

Posted - Feb 08 2013 :  4:35:47 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thank you parvati!

I'd say I'm going through a Kundalini activation experience that started 3 weeks ago and I can't meditate more than 5 minutes otherwise I experience overload. Every time I talk or read about spiritual stuff I can feel the energy stirring in my back. In fact, I can feel it now as I'm typing. I'm not fighting against this process because the mild ecstasy is awesome, especially when I feel it going through my body.

My question is: because of this sensitivity would you recommend stopping meditation because the process will go on by itself and eventually can cause overload? Or would you advise me to keep doing it 4-5 minutes a day?

Thanks.

quote:
Originally posted by parvati9

This is my kundalini experience from the past tense because the worst is over. For 3 years (2010, 2011, 2012) it was extremely uncomfortable at best and near frantic desperation at worst. Doing some fine tuning now and beginning to reap the benefits of this extraordinary experience. Had I known what was going on, it would have been more bearable. But I didn't have much of a clue. I knew very little about kundalini at the time.

Some successful strategies employed to cope with the spontaneous kundalini activation:

In the beginning, what probably helped me the most is those bi-metal bracelets, many of them made in India, or the magnetic type, readily available in the USA. Both types are very helpful in leveling out the energy surges and thus provide some temporary relief. For months I wore them day and night, only removing them to shower.

Personally I found crystals useful as well, but they aren't as easy to use as the bracelets and require experience and knowledge to employ effectively for this purpose. Nevertheless, they do work imo. Actually I was trying just about everything to see what would produce positive results.

Whereas I ordinarily practice Tai Chi and the result is enormously uplifting, that had to be self-paced and reduced. Most other types of exercise I found generally helpful in giving brief periods of respite. And sometimes Tai Chi helped. But other times it sent my energy through the roof. Calm and serenity is what I was aiming for, less energy not more. And I wanted no intensity in any part of my life. Intensity is what I wanted to get away from.

A comment here regarding family obligations. After much sifting and sorting from my memory trying to figure out how this kundalini activation got started, I realized that taking care of my father helped immensely to calm down the energy surges. It helped so much that I didn't have a problem at all. I took care of my father from 1996-2008. And from what I can ascertain the k activation began in 2000. It gradually kicked into high gear 4 years ago in January 2010 and until that time had been barely noticeable. But nothing about it seemed gradual once it really revved up.

During the intense activation phase, I was intuitively guided to try a heavier diet, higher in protein than my normal intake. Even though I am vata, and beans are not recommended for vata, I found that beans helped to promote a sense of well being, and I was eating more of them. Also eggs. And fish. I actually had to reduce my cheese consumption and for short periods like during the summer, gave it up entirely. I am mostly vegetarian, but found that I needed the fish. Any kind of protein I could get into my body seemed to help me feel better. Protein foods are generally heavier foods and that was what I required.

Lately as the kundalini activation began to ramp down, I have been consuming less protein, and have increased my intake of fresh juices which I juice myself. However, I notice that the juice (much lighter than most protein rich foods) usually increases my energy. Something I wouldn't have wanted to do until recently.

After being a year into this kundalini awakening, I was getting the idea that it really might just BE a kundalini thing (I didn't know for sure). I couldn't find any useful information online. What I did find was contradictory and didn't resonate. So I was basically on my own out in the middle of nowhere and I was very confused and lost. Needless to say I was relying on trial and error. After a lot of experimenting I discovered that going with the weird energy and being present with it was really all I could do. Fighting it or any kind of struggle whatsoever made it worse, sometimes so much worse that I cried for hours, or felt like my life was hopeless.

This is very important....when I learned to cooperate and work with the energy, it was so much easier. I would strongly recommend to do whatever possible to work with it. But at the same time, not to feed the energy or drive it more crazy than it already is. It takes some time to figure this out. Try to be patient with the process as it works itself out. You may need to do whatever you can to assist the process to stabilize, even out and level off. Most of the time, your goal will probably be to reduce rather than increase the spiritual component of the energy. I realize this may be counter-intuitive but it makes sense. It is our spiritual endeavors that drive the kundalini. So reducing and self-pacing anything with a spiritual component to it, may help limit and contain the k energy fluctuations and symptoms.

That was the hardest part for me. I somehow sensed that I had to back off from my spiritual endeavors, which for me, were rather obsessive. I almost completely stopped reading spiritual materials, which had become quite the indulgence. It was an indulgence I could no longer afford, at least not in the fever pitch kundalini stage. I even reduced the time I spent listening to spiritual music, which had always calmed and soothed me. In fact a lot of what I was doing was simply the opposite of what I normally did.

If I had known what was happening to me, I would have been able to take a more informed approach. As it was, I turned to the process itself for guidance, which was just as well. The process itself became my teacher and I have learned to respect her. It's virtually impossible to go through this experience without gaining some respect for the energy that has been driving you near crazy and from time to time, providing some bliss and ecstasy. It is referred to in these forums as the ecstatic conductivity.





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sunyata

USA
1508 Posts

Posted - Feb 09 2013 :  09:18:50 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi digofarias,
It's unbelievable that we are going through more or less the same experiences. Few months back, I was going through the same experience. If I read/listened anything spiritual, I would feel movement on the right side of my back but not the spine. I wonder if this is kundalini. My body would jerk. But, I did not want to stop meditating. So, what I did was- I would focus my attention on it when it started. If it went away or didn't scare me I would go on with the meditation. If it felt uncomfortable and felt like I was pushing it, I would call it quits for the day.
I never timed myself, but I didn't go over 20 minutes either. It could be 3 minutes, 7 minutes whatever was comfortable. I would listen to the inner guru. I don't have that experience anymore. I can easily do the morning meditation for 20 minutes. Now I'm working on the evening meditation. Hope this helps. Just my 2 cents, I'm still a rookie at this.

Love
Sunyata

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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Feb 14 2013 :  4:37:43 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by sunyata

Hi digofarias,
It's unbelievable that we are going through more or less the same experiences. Few months back, I was going through the same experience. If I read/listened anything spiritual, I would feel movement on the right side of my back but not the spine. I wonder if this is kundalini. My body would jerk. But, I did not want to stop meditating. So, what I did was- I would focus my attention on it when it started. If it went away or didn't scare me I would go on with the meditation. If it felt uncomfortable and felt like I was pushing it, I would call it quits for the day.
I never timed myself, but I didn't go over 20 minutes either. It could be 3 minutes, 7 minutes whatever was comfortable. I would listen to the inner guru. I don't have that experience anymore. I can easily do the morning meditation for 20 minutes. Now I'm working on the evening meditation. Hope this helps. Just my 2 cents, I'm still a rookie at this.

Love
Sunyata





Sounds like your subtle body influencing you. This is good. It is also good to cooperate with the unknown you, because that is essentially the source of some seriously cool things.
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Feb 16 2013 :  1:58:13 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi digofarias,

I can only offer the following based on my experience. What I learned was that there were certain things I could do to increase or decrease the k voltage. So I reduced or eliminated those things that increased the voltage and did almost exclusively those things that decreased the voltage.

It's all about balance. And learning how to best control that balance. Sometimes you will want to do anything but spiritual endeavors. I suppose that would include meditating, and self-pacing as suits you personally and uniquely.

After a while, when things settle down a bit, you can try to regulate the process. In other words, focus your attention on the k energy to guide or calm it down. However, this takes some patience and a lot of skillful practice or trial and error. It's definitely a balancing act.

In the beginning you may want to simply decrease the k energy. It's something like taming a wild stallion. You want the stallion adjusted to a slow pace. Slowly introducing a calm and gentle approach while simultaneously being totally accepting of the energy spikes i.e., don't fight with it. Not fighting it, yet learning to gently guide it--is what you probably want to do. Eventually. Allow for the learning curve and do your best to cultivate patience.

One thing I forgot to mention is the healing and regulating effect of water on kundalini (at least for me). I found anything water related calmed me down considerably. Any temperature, external or internal. I took lots of baths/showers as needed. I found myself drawn to lakes and streams, especially going to sleep and waking up to the sound of water. Drinking water was helpful (hot tea or cold lemonade, anything water based). Washing dishes calmed me. Just putting my hands or feet in water was wonderful, allowing me to feel serene and peaceful. The wild and frantic ecstasy currents stabilized and slowed to a gentle bliss. Even if it was only temporary.

Hoping this is somewhat helpful, and wishing you the very best.

parvati
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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Feb 17 2013 :  10:15:33 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
As the female is fragile, the man is strong. There is a division, and this is real.
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vijikr

United Arab Emirates
413 Posts

Posted - Feb 17 2013 :  12:34:13 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks for posting your K journey Parvati.Mostly I had burning sensation on my lower spine and I did get lots of rashes it jsut happens now and then.It breaks out mostly for me on my legs and recently was on hands.

Now I am fine I do self space and yes as you said parvati I noticed drinking water and eating anything closest to the nature helps a lot.I did eat only steamed veg and fresh fruits for almost for one and half month for breakfast,lunch and dinner and it helped a lot.

Love N Light

May All Find THAT Eternal Peace
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Feb 18 2013 :  12:08:49 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply

Calm, cool, peaceful, strong, stable, steady, serene, gentle, patient, tolerant, easy going, nonchalant, happy go lucky, quietly aware, relaxed, immovable (hard to move), imperturbable, resilient, flexible, accepting, content, blissful ... ..These are some of the qualities one might associate with kundalini's lover, the one for whom she is searching. She will not cease her relentless rampage until she has him in her embrace, until she is soothed by his presence or the presence of some of these qualities in you. Whatever you determine them to be, these are the attributes you may want to cultivate in order to appease or subdue her firey quest.
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sunyata

USA
1508 Posts

Posted - Feb 20 2013 :  8:48:56 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thank you for sharing your experience.. Parvati 9:). Your suggestions are very helpful:).

Good Way...Will you please elaborate your comment? Not sure if I get it. Thanks

Sunyata
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KundaliniTherapist

United Kingdom
26 Posts

Posted - Mar 04 2013 :  10:10:24 AM  Show Profile  Visit KundaliniTherapist's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Parvati
it's great that you could deal with your kundalini process so confidently and wisely. I find that a lot of people with kundalini (who are not part of a good spiritual system) get very anxious. Anxious means tension and tension makes everything worse.

It's not easy to be trusting when you feel all these strange sensations in your body and all these unusual thoughts and feelings in your mind. I applaud you to being able to learn from the process and go with it without giving way to fear and anxiety.

In my experience, the more you know about the kundalini process the better. But it is important to stay away from horror stories about the kundalini as they can create a lot of unnecessary anxiety.
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Mar 06 2013 :  10:21:46 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thankyou KundaliniTherapist. The focused intent of this discussion is to uplift and clarify, to offer relief and firm grounding...In the midst of an experience that can be, and often is, profoundly devastating. Your input is appreciated and most welcome indeed.


My attitude and personal response throughout this ordeal has remained committed to sorting the authentic from the synthetic, the real deep from the illusory superficial. The kundalini activation istself was perhaps more real than anything I had ever experienced before. Certainly more intense and passionate. It was the sensed reality and bleeding edge precision of the experience that enabled me to support and ground myself into it. I knew without a doubt I was going through something that was contributing to my common sense, rationality and spiritual evolution - although it frequently appeared otherwise. It was what I had been longing for. And I had known that when the time finally came for me to let go of the majority of my foolish attachments and aversions - it would be difficult.

The danger, as I saw it, was not so much in the physical and emotional upheaval, but rather in one's tendency to cling to self deception and the maintenance of ego defenses. The real danger was deluding myself as to what was beneficial and useful when a lot of what I had incorporated into my life was simply irrelevant. The irrelevant had to go. It was time.

The whole purpose of the energetic intensification, as I saw it, was to help me sort out my spiritual path. As I became increasingly more capable of surrendering to the process, and partnering with this incredible and miraculous energy, I gradually took ownership of it. Whereas initially it was processed as a set-back, illness, or invasion - something that robbed me of my normal comfortable life - I learned to embrace and honor the awakening. Even if it was severely traumatic. Even if not one person, at the time, understood what I was going through or was able to provide support.

My singular imperative was to honor the process and to extract from it the most precious jewel. Whereas initially it seemed an impediment, as time progressed, I began to see the kundalini awakiening as an outpicturing of my spiritual longing. As such I was finally able to affirm and assimilate my spiritual longing on a physical level... To embrace my own unfolding and flowering into a more perfect, pure, alert and blissful awareness.

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KundaliniTherapist

United Kingdom
26 Posts

Posted - Mar 06 2013 :  12:18:27 PM  Show Profile  Visit KundaliniTherapist's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
The danger, as I saw it, was not so much in the physical and emotional upheaval, but rather in one's tendency to cling to self deception and the maintenance of ego defenses


Hi Parvati
I think what you are saying about ego defences is extremely important. In tibetan buddhism it is said that all our suffering arises from our clinging to our ego - or in more psychological language the clinging to who we think we are.

We may have built up a nice character believing we are this lovely spiritually evolved being and have it all together in some way and then kundalini comes along and unleashes all our inner demons and our lovely self-image is in tatters. That is the real test: can we be humble and self-forgiving? Can we stay in witness consciousness instead of identifying with this inner 'mess'?

Together with our ego-clinging many more attachments need to go as you mention in your post as well. That can be very hard because we may not have anything else to replace the people or activities that we cling to but who do not fit our current development anymore.

In my own life I felt compelled to withdraw more and more from 'the world' and change everything from my diet to my friends and living accommodation. I did not always find that easy. But when you read biographies of spiritual seekers it is obvious that this is a phase that many people go through in their lives.
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Mar 08 2013 :  10:43:36 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
(Any comments or improvements on the following are welcome)



Kundalini is the spirit of truth, holy spirit or connectivity with the divine moving within our being. When this energy saturates us on every level it purges us of toxic substances, toxic thinking and inferior or damaging influences.

A life overly concerned with ego and material pleasure - creates neural pathways that are broken down when kundalini activates. Ordinarily this dynamic energy remains dormant with us. But when it is liberated and begins actively flowing, it has a very powerful influence on every level of our being and especially on our consciousness. It is a process of radical transformation down to the cellular level.

If we fight the k purification, we may unintentionally amplify our suffering. To smooth it out, we need to cooperate with the healing and purification work. Otherwise we can have a very rough go of it.

We may understand how many of our ego concerns have taken control of our lives internally, and how a materialistic culture has taken control of our lives externally. The two forces operate in collusion to prevent a healthy spiritual life and to obstruct our physical, mental and emotional healing. But kundalini, quite effectively, short circuits this sabotage of our spirit, light and true happiness. It rewires our neural pathways. This generally causes some (or a great deal of) discomfort. But the discomfort is minimized when we go along with the process instead of fighting or fearing it.

So there are various strategies we may employ to smooth out the k awakening. Becoming aware that what is happening to us is a good thing is the beginning. It then becomes quite possible to turn a potential nightmare situation into heaven on earth.



(edited for clarity)


Edited by - parvati9 on Mar 09 2013 10:50:51 AM
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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Mar 09 2013 :  10:03:54 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by parvati9

Hi KundaliniTherapist,

This is my belief and I would like to know what you believe.

Evil (suffering) is like infected software that infiltrates our consciousness and runs (ruins) our lives. K is radically transforming our lives, and re-establishing our spiritual identity, by ushering us into a deeper understanding of ourselves. Through it we are switched back on and DNA reactivated into our pure essence and true consciousness.

We are capable of facilitating our withdrawal from the confusion, evil, or suffering. From false association with the synthetic life of superficial materialism.

On all levels - from the micro to the macro - k purges us of toxic substances, toxic thinking, and virus infested software. It makes us aware of malfunctioning programs and running defective sub routines - at the spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, social/cultural and cellular levels.

If we allow it, we see how we have become shallow, hypnotized, and manipulated by inferior code/ideology both internally through ego and externally through influence from a materialistic culture.

K is the spirit of truth, holy spirit or connectivity with the divine. It has an energy frequency or vibration. When this frequency saturates our being on every level, we clearly see ourselves as powerful manifestations of the divine light.



If you don't mind me saying something, I'd just like to interject that power is one of less interesting dimensions of having kundalini awakened. Sure, it is nice to feel like a you're hooked into an electric socket, vibrating calmly; it's reassuring you know?

However, it is much more fun when you become the person from whom you feel alienated, when you have to endure this process. Stay in contact with the person that you like in you.









Edited by - Goodway on Mar 09 2013 10:18:32 AM
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Mar 09 2013 :  11:53:57 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by Goodway
If you don't mind me saying something, I'd just like to interject that power is one of less interesting dimensions of having kundalini awakened. Sure, it is nice to feel like a you're hooked into an electric socket, vibrating calmly; it's reassuring you know?

However, it is much more fun when you become the person from whom you feel alienated, when you have to endure this process. Stay in contact with the person that you like in you.


Thanks Goodway. Your comment is appreciated. A revision of that statement was in progress while you were posting. I agree with staying in contact with the person that you like in you. Power is the nature of it though. When people are in the midst of a spontaneous awakening, and don't know what is happening to them, they can feel overwhelmed and at the mercy of this powerful energy. That energy needs to be dealt with in a positive way and preceived as a great opportunity - is what I was trying to say. I hope the revised version is better, perhaps you would care to give your opinion on that?



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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Mar 10 2013 :  09:18:42 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by parvati9

quote:
Originally posted by Goodway
If you don't mind me saying something, I'd just like to interject that power is one of less interesting dimensions of having kundalini awakened. Sure, it is nice to feel like a you're hooked into an electric socket, vibrating calmly; it's reassuring you know?

However, it is much more fun when you become the person from whom you feel alienated, when you have to endure this process. Stay in contact with the person that you like in you.


Thanks Goodway. Your comment is appreciated. A revision of that statement was in progress while you were posting. I agree with staying in contact with the person that you like in you. Power is the nature of it though. When people are in the midst of a spontaneous awakening, and don't know what is happening to them, they can feel overwhelmed and at the mercy of this powerful energy. That energy needs to be dealt with in a positive way and preceived as a great opportunity - is what I was trying to say. I hope the revised version is better, perhaps you would care to give your opinion on that?







I think that it goes a bit overboard but that it is reasonably close to the truth.
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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Mar 10 2013 :  12:05:11 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I think it also wise to understand that having kundalini awakened means working on your entire chakra system, not only the upper regions. It is common for awakened people to really get caught in the stratosphere and root meditations help in this matter. To me it is not about giving up the material universe, but integrating it wisely into our lives, so that it becomes our friend rather than our enemy. This is why I am such an environmentalist, for example.



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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Mar 11 2013 :  8:32:02 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
KundaliniTherapist nailed it when she said our suffering arises from clinging to ego or "who we think we are".

When the spontaneous k activation became very intense these last few years, I had absolutely no idea what was going on. At first I thought I was sick but it didn't just go away after a few weeks or months. And there were aspects to it that weren't at all like being ill, such as my extremely high energy. It seemed that I "wasn't myself" and my body was behaving very strangely. I no longer felt in control of my life, thoughts, feelings or physical sensations.

What I wanted, and I wanted it very badly, was for my life to return to the way it was before all this weirdness started. The kundalini energy was way too intense and I found it impossible to be my usual calm self. I was a tiny boat being tossed about in a big sea and a horrible storm.

Now since I have this tendency to analyze everything, I had to find out what was going on. In retrospect, I have to know why I didn't feel in control of my life. From reading how others are affected by spontaneous k activation, it appears to be quite common to feel one is losing control of one's life. So why is this?

In my opinion, it is because we are clinging to who we think we are. And who we are is changing dramatically every day as Shakti obsessively cleans house. Who you think you are is what anchors your life. When 'who you think you are' is changing every day - there isn't a solid anchor anymore. Shakti was driving my idea of 'who I think I am' deeper and deeper. So I had to continually release the more superficial concepts of my self identity. And this reorganization of my identity was more or less a daily routine.

It was precisely my willingness to be flexible that enabled me to feel in control of my life again. But I nearly had to be forced into doing this, as it was about the last thing I tried.


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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Mar 11 2013 :  10:27:59 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by parvati9

KundaliniTherapist nailed it when she said our suffering arises from clinging to ego or "who we think we are".

When the spontaneous k activation became very intense these last few years, I had absolutely no idea what was going on. At first I thought I was sick but it didn't just go away after a few weeks or months. And there were aspects to it that weren't at all like being ill, such as my extremely high energy. It seemed that I "wasn't myself" and my body was behaving very strangely. I no longer felt in control of my life, thoughts, feelings or physical sensations.

What I wanted, and I wanted it very badly, was for my life to return to the way it was before all this weirdness started. The kundalini energy was way too intense and I found it impossible to be my usual calm self. I was a tiny boat being tossed about in a big sea and a horrible storm.

Now since I have this tendency to analyze everything, I had to find out what was going on. In retrospect, I have to know why I didn't feel in control of my life. From reading how others are affected by spontaneous k activation, it appears to be quite common to feel one is losing control of one's life. So why is this?

In my opinion, it is because we are clinging to who we think we are. And who we are is changing dramatically every day as Shakti obsessively cleans house. Who you think you are is what anchors your life. When 'who you think you are' is changing every day - there isn't a solid anchor anymore. Shakti was driving my idea of 'who I think I am' deeper and deeper. So I had to continually release the more superficial concepts of my self identity. And this reorganization of my identity was more or less a daily routine.

It was precisely my willingness to be flexible that enabled me to feel in control of my life again. But I nearly had to be forced into doing this, as it was about the last thing I tried.






Well, I'd agree with you, if I didn't foresee it entering me into a power struggle.



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Goodway

USA
99 Posts

Posted - Mar 12 2013 :  06:00:16 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Secondly, I find myself becoming more like I think I am rather than less. There is a stability within the change that the East would call our "original face." It need not be put in such a mystical term, but, in this situation, I am forced to leave it so.

I suppose that I can say this:

In the sea of changing, there are things that one should never allow to be lost.








Edited by - Goodway on Mar 12 2013 06:23:34 AM
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Mar 12 2013 :  12:15:06 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
How I became acquainted with the goddess..

Shakti made my mind go quiet like nothing I had ever known.

Once I accepted her as my (life) coach and teacher, there was both an obvious and subtle change in the discomfort I had been experiencing. The obvious result was a new feeling of buoyancy and joy. My life was starting to become effortless; the enormous struggle that had consumed me was diminishing and evaporating. The subtle result was that I started listening to her. When I wanted clarification of some issue, she showed me to my satisfaction everything I needed to know.

Shakti showed me how my inconsistent faith in the divine was directly related to immune deficiency. When I got sick it was largely because I allowed myself to be unnecessarily vulnerable and this weakened my immune system. I wasn't countering toxic exposure with a faith that could overcome.

My faith had holes in it. When she pointed out the holes to me, as a team (me and her) we could easily repair them. Once I understood how I had permitted the holes, I simultaneously knew how to prevent and/or repair them.

On every level Shakti restored my faith. She encouraged me to become an active participant in the healing and purification. In the latter stages of the awakening, I was not only willing to assist her, but I had also cultivated a dexterity and skill in doing so. When I had started out this journey I was confused and unsure of myself. But as it progressed, as my spiritual agility perfected itself, I became an extremely competent student. I was very responsive to even a subtle hint from Shakti.

And that is how I became acquainted with the grace of the goddess.
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AumNaturel

Canada
687 Posts

Posted - Mar 12 2013 :  1:31:45 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by parvati9

Shakti showed me how my inconsistent faith in the divine was directly related to immune deficiency. When I got sick it was largely because I allowed myself to be unnecessarily vulnerable and this weakened my immune system. I wasn't countering toxic exposure with a faith that could overcome.


Inspiring bit of information you have acquired from your experience with Shakti, something I will consider and also implement alongside other health-related efforts. Thank you for passing it on.

Your account adds to the testimony of incidental healing alongside the spiritual path of a growing number of people. The first one I've come across that also directly attributes it to Shakti was JJ Semple, who goes on to propose a theory based on its interaction with a so-called personal blueprint and redressing deviations as found in one's phenotype.
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KundaliniTherapist

United Kingdom
26 Posts

Posted - Mar 12 2013 :  1:40:33 PM  Show Profile  Visit KundaliniTherapist's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Parvati
the process you describe in your last post is very advanced. Good for you that you can work in this way. Most of my kundalini clients are at the beginning of their journey and are often very afraid, confused and desperately want to go back to their own personality.

I always say that kundalini awakening is a bit like puberty - everything has to change and there is no going back. If we imagine that nobody would have taught us about the changes that happen at puberty we might be thinking we are sick and going crazy. But being prepared has prevented this for most of us.

Overall, I find kundalini is a great amplifier of everything that is going on in our mind - good and bad. While we could get away with a lot of things before kundalini (e.g. eating junkfood or staying in dysfunctional relationships) the intensity of suffering after a k.awakening makes this impossible. We have to change and we have to change a lot. All this happens at an accelerated pace because k throws more and more 'things' up from our unconscious mind as time goes on.

For most people it is their intensified emotions that are the biggest challenge: panic, depression and anger to an extend that they have never known before. That is where my work comes in as I can help people to work through these emotions so that they subside quickly.
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parvati9

USA
587 Posts

Posted - Mar 13 2013 :  12:10:14 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Goodway,

Our k experiences are different in various ways. Thanks for offering your contrasting opinion. Please feel free to elaborate and continue sharing whatever you'd like to contribute.
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