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frogurt
Canada
9 Posts |
 Posted - Feb 01 2023 : 01:17:10 AM
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Hello Everyone,
It's been a year so I will introduce myself. I've been here reading for a while; I read the entire site once and then again this past year on AYP Plus and am grateful that such a resource is available. I first got into spiritual work through a school of chi kung did not look beyond that circle for a long time, but learning about things from the yogic perspective really put things in... perspective :)
I celebrate my 1 year anniversary of AYP practice on 01Feb.
My optimal routine is 8 min pranayama breathing, 5 reps of YMK, and 20min deep meditation.
I do not always succeed and probably half the time my routine is truncated to 15 minutes. From my chi kung days I can feel prana moving when I do pranayama and deep meditation can be nice though the mind wanders often. Sometimes I go a bit deeper. Because of my schedule, I end up meditating in the evening before going to bed. I do not feel it causes me any issues and do not feel any issue with not resting more than a minute after DM.
Previous to this, I had some singular experiences over the years with energy flow (amazing microcosmic orbit during a Vipassana course) and some major cleansing after a chi kung intensive with the grand master of my chi kung lineage.
But then, as now, I feel like I have had some nice experiences but there has not been a "shift".
I'm not really sure what I have to show for the time I have put in this past year with AYP. Maybe I'm a bit less short-tempered than I was. Maybe.
I also lost my father in October and now already my mother is in hospital with terminal cancer (I have added her name to the samyama list, please pray for her). I haven't practiced since that was learned a week ago. And between my father's passing and now, it has been hard to meditate, but I did.
I don't run home to sit on my meditation cushion. It is always a chore, though I do enjoy doing it and it feels nice. But I do not feel the witness, or I am not able to perceive it if it is a subtle thing, and so I do not do samyama since I do not sense the witness. Though even at this time sitting and doing the entire ~40minutes from start to finish is only something I succeed with half the time.
It's a very tough time. Losing both my parents in so short a time.
Any advice would be welcome. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Feb 01 2023 : 08:20:47 AM
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Dear Frogurt,
Welcome to the forums. Thank you for sharing. I'm sorry to hear of your loss and current family situation.
At the beginning, the witness is often experienced as a sense of calm during the flow of daily activities. During sittings, it is experienced as a sense of inner space. You have an "inside" and not just an "outside".
Hope that is helpful. Wishing you inner strength.
Sey 
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Dogboy
USA
2193 Posts |
Posted - Feb 01 2023 : 3:25:53 PM
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Welcome frogurt 
The best progress over time is realized from a disciplined, consistent practice, and ideally, meditating at least one of the (twice daily) sessions in the morning, so that “the fruits of practice”, ie inner silence and Witness, can be carried into your daily activities, rather than ‘lost in sleep’. And framing your practices as ‘a chore’ becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and can be a trick of your ego trying to avoid thoughtlessness in any form, thereby sabotaging progress. One of the first indications of Witness is acknowledging you are thinking thoughts that may not necessarily be true, catching yourself in real time spinning these thoughts, and then challenging them directly (“is this conclusion true?” “Is this judgement helpful?”).
Results on the path are often subtle and reveal themselves over time. It was many months into conductivity (after three and a half years of disciplined practices) that I was certain of what I was experiencing was in fact nascent conductivity, that in time became a daily feature. The same can be said for growing inner silence and the witness state. Now nine and a half years in, these states are easily available via attention/intention, and easily integrated in my everyday.
I am sorry for the hardships you are currently experiencing with the health of your parents. In times like this, your practices can help in the processing and acceptance of the situation, by observing your thought trains and allowing for inner silence to come forth in a calming, subtle way. My only advice at this year anniversary is to keep your daily practices as disciplined as possible, and to be on guard of your ego trying to talk you out of yoga because it is threatened by the thoughtless state. I can report the AYP system does realize ecstatic living over time, if you can do it without commentary or judgement from the mind and simply for the sake of the promise of neurobiological change. Over time, ‘subtleness’ yields to more definitive results if you put in the daily time and desire for it. Good luck and keep on trucking! |
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frogurt
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - Feb 01 2023 : 5:22:40 PM
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Dear Sey and Dogboy,
A pleasure to meet you both; I have enjoyed reading your contributions to the forum over the years. Thank you for your condolences regarding this tough time.
Sey, I appreciate your explanation of the witness in the beginning. I think I have been expecting the witness to be that experience where people report watching themselves go through an activity, separate from themselves. Perhaps I have experienced the witness during meditation. Once in a while I feel a shift in how my body feels; it expands and I feel like immense, like a great distance exists between my legs and my head and a kind of openness, vastness. Is this "inner space"?
Dogboy, thank you for your thoughts. Yes, I do meditate in the morning and evening. I have been extremely diligent with this meditation practice until recently (even though I had some shortened sessions, I always put it some time). I started meditation with the understanding that I need to do this for myself to overcome my shortcomings (temper, pessimism, judgementalism, etcetera etcetera) and to be able to better show up for the people I love in life. When I said "chore", I felt it too strong a word, but I left it in there. Maybe "duty" is the right word. Duty to myself, and to be the best version of myself for others. But I certainly do not run home to sit and meditate.
My impulse to judge is very strong. It feels instantaneous. I do catch myself at times, but I don't know that meditation plays a role necessarily. As I grow older, I think I am becoming less harsh because I am realizing it's no good for me. At least with some situations. And with age, my priorities and perspectives have changed. Maybe meditation has played a role over this year too. Maybe.
Thank you for your advice at this anniversary and your warnings for potential issues at this stage. I will keep on trucking!
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Feb 02 2023 : 05:46:44 AM
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Yes, that is inner space. Right now there is an "I" noticing the inner space and you identify with that "I". Over time, you start identifying with that openness as your "I"
Sey |
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interpaul
USA
524 Posts |
Posted - Feb 02 2023 : 07:07:08 AM
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| Frogurt, Welcome to the forum. I am in my 4th year of practices and I have experienced a slow and gradual unfolding punctuated by interesting moments (scenery). I also came here after first discovering Taoist meditation practices. I believe my very first post was trying to get clarification on the difference between spinal breathing and the microcosmic orbit. I have come to value my AYP practices. For me, they are definitely not a chore and I have found the practices very pleasurable to do. It is normal to doubt and wonder if you are making progress. Because of the Taoist practices I was already familiar with pranic energy but the inner silence was much harder to understand. It does slowly make its presence known. I haven't reached a place of abiding inner slience but this isn't a race. I have gone through a number of deaths and challenges and the practices do help me to keep my balance. Keep at it and I think you will have fewer doubts over time. |
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frogurt
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - Feb 03 2023 : 6:37:55 PM
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Sey, wow this really changes my perspective on my experience with the witness. Here I was thinking there was none yet, while I have actually experienced the beginnings of it during meditation. Thank you!
interpaul, thank you for your words and encouragement. I can relate to much you've said, such as looking into the difference between MO and spinal breathing, and being very familiar with prana moving.
One thing I have struggled with is that whether it was my chi kung practice in previous years, or my current year-long AYP practice, is that I have not felt it spill over into "real life" outside of the practices. During practice I feel prana, and now I understand I can experience the witness, but outside of practices, things feel the same. I suppose as you said, keep at it and I will have fewer doubts, and hopefully things will spill over from practice into life. |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Feb 06 2023 : 06:27:25 AM
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Dear Frogurt,
Samyama is the practice that targets the flow of Inner Silence (the Witness) into daily life. If you find the time, you can add it to your practice.
It can be found here:
https://www.aypsite.org/150.html
Sey |
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frogurt
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - Feb 07 2023 : 01:59:04 AM
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Thank you for connecting all these things for me, Sey!
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SparklingDiamond
Australia
227 Posts |
Posted - Mar 02 2023 : 2:22:38 PM
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thank you so much Sey for sharing this! quote:
Originally posted by SeySorciere
Dear Frogurt,
Samyama is the practice that targets the flow of Inner Silence (the Witness) into daily life. If you find the time, you can add it to your practice.
It can be found here:
https://www.aypsite.org/150.html
Sey
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frogurt
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - May 07 2023 : 08:58:26 AM
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Hello All,
For a couple months I have added Samyama to my practice and some prayers afterwards and I find now that my meditations last so long (8min SB, 5xYMK, 20min DM, 10min Samyama, 5min prayer= about 45-50min) that I am less motivated to meditate and I often get restless because it is so long, and so I end up cutting things short.
I need to cut back to a time that I can manage. However, I would still like to keep the samyama and prayer. My question: instead of going back to only 8min SB, 5xYMK, 20min DM for ~35min would it be okay to do something like 5min SB, 5xYMK, 15min DM, and 5min Samyama and prayer? Any drawbacks?
Thank you |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - May 15 2023 : 07:32:48 AM
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Dear Frogurt,
In AYP, DM is the primary practice and stand-alone practice which is the base on which all else is built. You can go all the way with DM alone. Hence if strapped for time, DM is the last thing you cut short. I would suggest you take out the 5xYMK instead.
Enjoy your practices
Sey
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frogurt
Canada
9 Posts |
Posted - May 28 2023 : 06:27:06 AM
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Thank you again for your insights, Sey.
I'ml trying to maintain my practice for now with 5min SBP and 15min DM, and then 5 min of prayer, morning and eve. Better to stay regular with something small than be irregular with something big. |
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One year of AYP practice
