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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 03 2021 : 03:11:51 AM
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| Don't worry Will,you're not going nuts, even though it may feel like it at the moment, just repeat the mantra 'everything that is happening is exactly what is meant to be happening in order for me to grow into freedom' |
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Yogabuzz108
United Kingdom
75 Posts |
Posted - Jul 04 2021 : 03:31:47 AM
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Wil buddy,
I know exactly what's happening for you at the moment (but I don't answer questions I haven't been asked), what you are experiencing is a perfectly normal result of advancement/purification of the system, and a perfectly normal result of practice, even though I know it may not feel like that at the moment, many have been though what you are experiencing and many more will after you, try not to worry about what is happening, rather, try to enjoy it, it's a bit like being on a roller coaster ride for the first time, when we are on it it feels scary, but when we get off, we wonder what it was we were frightened of... and you will actually miss it... but don't chase it as that won't lead anywhere good.
In love,
Yogabuzz108 |
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Wil
Sweden
150 Posts |
Posted - Jul 05 2021 : 5:49:10 PM
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I wish you all the best! The best! For instance, have a great summer!
Thank you again Sey and Yogabuzz for your attention.
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Wil
Sweden
150 Posts |
Posted - Apr 05 2023 : 3:26:53 PM
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Now, a slight follow-up on my more personal inputs in this thread.
I have been trough more time now. With time I now see that any content will be disposed or changed including how meditation affects me. I got used to proportionately and sometimes indirectly (eg. poetically) conveying my 'real' deep meanings in conversations. Not to say that I was 'fake' before but , lets say, I got used to the 'more real'. In the end watercooler-talk is as 'real' as speaking of the non dual Advaita teachings.
The small thing I foremost want to share today is how I respond when people ask me how meditation affects me and what it gives me. The response nowadays is usually:
"I get used to the benefits that seems to be endless..so it gives me nothing in the end ".
I try to match this to the context to not discourage meditation too much but overall I find that this is a useful response. If I break it down, I feel the benefits per say involves a lot of letting go of scenery that SEEMS to be the benefits. |
Edited by - Wil on Apr 05 2023 3:47:34 PM |
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Wil
Sweden
150 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2023 : 4:53:39 PM
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I'm back in this journal-thread again. This topic blossoms new meaning again and again.
Not only can I see the initial purpose of this thread. Which was to investigate the sometimes dysfunctional comparison between dualism and non-dualism(Advaita) in communication and inquiry.
..but also, I can see that this comparison still is in my hands until perhaps..Inner silence decides to bathe me in a thick 24/7 fountain of bliss.
Self-inquiry note
This is again a sticky subject ofcourse but anyway...
I felt recently that I want to express why I don't care about some things. (eg. It's spiritual dispassion that justifies it)
Again back in this thread, I see that I can and need to dodge that too at times...let go and let god.
Non-dualism (Advaita) used without relation to cultivated bliss(God) could turn out rude, psychopathic and IMO bloody dangerous. Like a doctor shrugging at a dying mother, because he feels it's her karma and that he HAS spiritual dispassion to choose to not care. Or like dispassionate' homicidal suicide bombers that DECIDED that that was what their God' told them to do.
Even forcing me to be more 'spiritual' and not drink coffee, justified by Spiritual dispassion seems unnatural. Instead of let go (drink coffee according to urge/karma) and let god (the natural seize of unnecessary habits). It is more like "let go of god and let you be god".
I think the self-inquiry point that I dance around is the following. AYPs saying that one should just continue to live as one did before AYP and that harmful habits and behaviours will drop in time.
I have experienced this is true but I'm still where, as I said, I want to express how it could be okay to not care sometimes. Whether it is to drink alcohol according to your urges/karma or to ignore a person screaming at you for not participating in pity-party.
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2023 : 08:35:34 AM
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Hi Will,
I will try to say a few words. I too have difficulty in expressing to people as to what benefits AYP will bring them - I usually go for "peace /less stress", language anyone can understand. The real deal cannot be put into words - years of effort for nothing that can be displayed overtly, nothing glamourous or powerful or mystical. No fame. It is the ordinary. It does attract others, this ordinariness. It does cause others to beam (smile) at you for no clear reason.
Yogani does stress on the presence of abiding inner silence for relational self-enquiry to effectively take place - I guess you are equating cultivated bliss with Inner Silence (all good). It allows for recognition of that which is not the Self verses that which always is - It allows for the switch in identification to happen.
Dispassion is not non-caring detachment. It is the deepest caring, which need not necessarily translate into action by a do-er. I need not do anything. I am there, present.
Last Friday, the husband of a childhood friend passed away. They are one of those most rare couples who are still very much in love after 40+ years. I went to visit my friend because I knew she would be feeling devastated. I held her while she wept but I did not feel any emotion - tears did flow down my face - well, joy, I felt joy, like I always do. I was amazed at how shortly after, she started talking about him and laughing. I visited again yesterday and she has accepted the passing away and is coping with it really well.
I am rambling. I was trying to put into words the state of dispassion.
Sey
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Wil
Sweden
150 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2023 : 3:26:13 PM
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Great that you put some flesh to the bone with an example Sey..fresh from your life. Please ramble at me if you need to :)
Well, this latest post of mine is a mess and as you Sey said. Dispassion is an unconditional deep caring. A sidenote is that I think true dispassion has been very misconstrued in the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali or whereever. I think it is more like what Yogani says, that the witness is something that comes with practice rather than active will or even action.
I was again playing with the mindgames, if dispassion is here with me or not is a question with another answer and another time. I'll keep on dancing with the paradoxes... until 'now'   .
I re-read the lesson on the various stages of Witness, Prewitness, Discrimination, Unity and Dispassion. It humbled me too. |
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Dogboy
USA
2195 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2023 : 11:51:08 PM
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Yesterday I took our cat to the veterinary emergency room, he had stopped eating and was severely constipated. After “clearing him out”, a blood panel revealed he has acute kidney disease, and most likely has weeks to live. I had spent all day there, and wanted nothing more than to go home with him, but for some reason, the report was not filed and I could not check out at the front desk. After a long wait I checked again and learned the doctor was called into an emergency situation and was sorry for making me wait, for my cat and the bill.
I recognized it as an opportunity to be quiet and witness all the emotions, feelings, injustices my thoughts were spilling forth. I put my head into my hands, closed my eyes, and began DM. At some point the sheepish doctor appeared with my cat and I paid and left after and hour and a half longer than it should have been.
The ride home I reviewed being able to be dispassionate in such a situation, that perhaps a few short years ago, would have definitely resulted in me acting out. I felt silence when he delivered the bad news, I felt silence while watching myself try to stay in check, I felt silence in the impulse to ‘wait it out’ inside instead of relying on the outside situation. There was silence in surrendering “injustice”. I recognized it for what it was: proof that my practices are working for me, and frankly, anyone else looking on in that waiting room.
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Wil
Sweden
150 Posts |
Posted - Aug 19 2023 : 03:58:54 AM
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I read your answer but forgot to respond Dogboy.
What a beautiful story of surrendering. And sorry to hear about your cat!
This time reading, it made me think about how I take many behaviours I now do for granted. Maybe I have a true dispassionate 'cool' moment now and then too. I hope so.
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Edited by - Wil on Aug 19 2023 11:23:32 AM |
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SeySorciere
Seychelles
1532 Posts |
Posted - Aug 21 2023 : 07:24:57 AM
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That said, it is not everyday that I sit in the lofty seat of the state of dispassion. Today, I am barely witnessing! The past weeks have been filled with many unfortunate events - too many. Right now, I am sick with a persistent flu. Yesterday I fell and twisted my left foot, now very painful. I am feeling very sorry for myself. 
The sun will come out tomorrow, so I gotta hang on til tomorrow…
Sey |
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Blanche
USA
859 Posts |
Posted - Aug 21 2023 : 1:03:43 PM
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Like August rain -
To care about everything and hold to nothing:
Compassion and dispassion.
Sey, hope the troubles will pass soon. I find meditation/inquiry/samyama healing. |
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Comparison and all its subtlety
