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 Kundalini - AYP Practice-Related
 Road blocks
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PastMorning

USA
16 Posts

Posted - Nov 10 2017 :  6:29:42 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
I'm just gauging what the community here might suggest in response to my situation.

I've been dealing with prematurely awakened Kundalini since the fall of 2012, the first year I started meditating and the last year I used psychedelics. I underwent a psychotic episode that had to be medicated in order to find stability. I finally got off medication in 2015 and I've been sober since 2012 of everything else, but ever since 2015, I've been immensely stagnated in my ability to practice.

I seem to have a combination of kundalini excess and oversensitivity. Anytime I meditate, do asanas, exercise, and even release sexually, my kundalini energy rips through my system creating immense discomfort. It seems to be miles ahead of me with regard to the Shakti side of things.

I've tried kundalini assistance as echoed in the lessons here and that creates too much discomfort. I tried mantra enhancements from the oversensitivity lessons and that didn't help. Even the lightest meditation with the breath is enough to enough to send my energy spinning. I'm constantly dealing with discomfort even when I abstain from practice. It's tolerable in comparison to much more severe situations I've had, but it's still far from where I would like it to be.

There are no Kundalini teachers in my area, so I was wondering if any of you had any possible insights into what I could possibly do to smooth things out.

Thank you

Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Nov 10 2017 :  7:20:43 PM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
You need to plug into people, friendly animals, the four elements (earth, air, water, fire...leave inner space alone for a while). Walk barefoot in the grass, read Walt Whitman, find a massage therapist with sensitive and grounding touch, pick up a musical instrument and find solace in the physical connection with the object, hug a tree, hug somebody new that you just met, hug yourself by crossing your arms and grabbing your shoulders. Seek out people that will welcome you with open arms, as you are.

Plug in, my friend, plug in. It is the connection that heals, the connection that balances and harmonizes, the connection that liberates.

The more you reconnect with the outer world, the more the inner world will be more comfortable and inviting. It is a revolving door. Always.

Unity. Strength. Wisdom.
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Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Nov 10 2017 :  7:25:25 PM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Oh, and warm, belly laughter. Laughter is the best medicine, like tears of joy. Put yourself in situations that induce those reactions.

If I'm feeling lazy, I just pull up Conan O'Brien on YouTube.
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PastMorning

USA
16 Posts

Posted - Nov 10 2017 :  8:09:53 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Yup, those habits have been my saving grace ultimately. I'm even managing a social life in a small town without transportation. It's really an ultimate slow burn situation. Purification is happening, it's quite obvious, but there are times where I'm really tested and I would love to practice, but I'm always burned with immediate overload.
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sunyata

USA
1506 Posts

Posted - Nov 10 2017 :  9:39:57 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi PastMorning,

Good advice from, Bodhi.

Asanas and group meditations help as well.

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Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Nov 10 2017 :  10:30:51 PM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Amen, PastMorning.

I've had to self-pace from time to time too. It's all good. I just remind myself that my quality of life is far more important than practices. I master the practices; the practices don't master me.

Those of us with a thirst for acceleration have to learn to slow down sometimes! Slow and steady wins the race, as they say.

Let's enjoy the knowingness that we have plenty of time and space, and that a solution is always within reach.
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BlueRaincoat

United Kingdom
1730 Posts

Posted - Nov 11 2017 :  03:02:48 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi PastMorning

Sorry to hear about your troubles.

Does passive awareness meditation trigger the same dramatic effects as mantra or breath meditation? If this is the case, then grounding might be the best bet. It sounds like you have a good understanding of the AYP lessons and you know what you're doing.

Do not despair. We are each of us on our path. Accepting things as they are is a practice in itself. Maybe this is the lesson you needed to learn?

All the best to you
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Blanche

USA
859 Posts

Posted - Nov 11 2017 :  06:58:02 AM  Show Profile  Visit Blanche's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi PastMorning,

It must be frustrating to deal with the symptoms and the inability to practice. Have you read Lesson 69 - Kundalini symptoms, imbalances, and remedies?

You got good advice here. I would emphasize a healthy, heavier diet, and daily exercise. They both help balance the excess energy. This energy is either used and grounded, or it acts out uncontrollably in your nervous system. Once awakened, kundalini does not usually go dormant again, so the only option is to ride its wave, and make the best of it.

Warm wishes.
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PastMorning

USA
16 Posts

Posted - Nov 11 2017 :  1:38:11 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by BlueRaincoat

Does passive awareness meditation trigger the same dramatic effects as mantra or breath meditation?


Indeed, in fact, symptoms are worse with passive than they are with breath and breath happens to be intensely discomforting at the moment.
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