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Tantra - A Holistic View of Spiritual Development

Is this tantra?

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anthony574

USA
549 Posts

Posted - Jul 13 2008 : 2:51:38 PM

Hey guys, quick question (hopefully)

I haven never really taken up tantra heavily except that I would try to abstain from ejaculation. Now that I am becoming more sensitive to inner energies I am once again interested in tantra. Also, it is due to the fact that my enjoyment of sex is really decreasing and I know that there is more to be had.

For one, I always thought I should never masturbate. For two, when I have sex I always thought I should stay away from ejaculation. If you measure stimulation on a scale of 1-10 I would stay away from even 7 or so. I always did this excepting that tantra would just happen combined with abstaining from ejaculation...never did. Actually, i just lost all enjoyment of sex. And because I was getting nothing out of it the only thing left to do was make sure my girlfriend enjoys it...but goal-oritented sex isn't very enjoyable or erotic.

So recently I have been drawn to masturbation. I don't stress about what I use as a stimulus. The point is, I find that I am really enjoying getting about to a 9 and then seeing how long I can hold it there without slipping over the edge. I'm finding I can stay there for longer periods of time (eventually I "burn out" and can't "hold the charge") and I can sense energy being directed upwards when I flex the perinuem or when I stop stimulation. This to me feels like the beginnings of tantra, not what I was doing before. I still try not to ejaculate, however.

I only ever read one book on tantra where it actually suggested this exact thing combined with mindful breathing and other body manipulations. Then I got into AYP and I found yogani's approach to tantra vague in the physical sense. I took from the book that I was supposed to stay way away from orgasm (not the threshold) and somehow it was all going to fall into place. I think I may have misinterpreted...but either way, will this technique get me to where I want to go? I am already feeling the potential for multiple orgasms without ejaculation and I am enjoying sex more too. I just don't want to be doing a practice that may still be draining energetically.

Also, when is a good time to do this type of practice? Oddly, I get the urge to do it after sadhana. I tried it before sadhana before and found my spinal breathing to be particularly energetic and my meditation to be very serene. I think it is good for clearing the mind of a busy day's thoughts. Also, is it possible to do it too much? I find in an indidivual session at first I can hold that strong charge at the threshold of orgasm for a while, almost a minute. But then everytime I bring myself back up to that point it either wants to go past the point to ejaculation or way back down.

Thanks for the help. I really really wanna be tantric!

Anthem

1608 Posts

Posted - Jul 14 2008 : 12:03:04 PM

quote:
I only ever read one book on tantra where it actually suggested this exact thing combined with mindful breathing and other body manipulations. Then I got into AYP and I found yogani's approach to tantra vague in the physical sense. I took from the book that I was supposed to stay way away from orgasm (not the threshold) and somehow it was all going to fall into place.

Hi Anthony,

I found the AYP tantra vague as well, but it is truly all that is needed in the long run, though it can take many years before tantra is really enjoyed if you don't stumble upon the ideal partner. It is sitting practices that free up the nervous system enough over time to really experience the circulation of sexual energy higher up in the neural biology. I opted in the interim for a bunch of different methods (I have written about in other posts) to amplify the tantra experience like spinal breathing, breath retention (both during sexual activity), etc. which all work very well in getting the ball rolling, but these also have their down sides as well.

A person's tantric experience is largely a function of the state of their nervous system. When you are solo, it is a function of just your own nervous system, when with a partner, it is a function of both people's nervous systems and the energy dynamics between them. I have had tantric experiences with partners in the past and not with newer partners despite having more years of meditation and pranayama under my belt. The right partner can be a great accelerator down the path of really feeling tantra, but ultimately the limitations of your own nervous system will dictate your experience.

quote:
I think I may have misinterpreted...but either way, will this technique get me to where I want to go? I am already feeling the potential for multiple orgasms without ejaculation and I am enjoying sex more too. I just don't want to be doing a practice that may still be draining energetically.

Playing around the point of no return will provide lots of learning. For me it often involved eventually falling over the edge. Multiple orgasms from my perspective weren't energy draining (unless taken to excess) but were still missing the boat of true tantra. If it helps a person get from tradtional ejaculatory sexual activity to enjoying non-ejaculatory sexual activity then that is a good stepping stone. I played with this for the better part of 3 years looking for ever higher and more intense experiences before it became somewhat uninteresting for me. Would I have arrived where I am now more quickly without this side trip or was it an integral part of it? I have no idea. We have to do what we are called to do and it certainly is a fun side-trip.

quote:
Also, when is a good time to do this type of practice? Oddly, I get the urge to do it after sadhana. I tried it before sadhana before and found my spinal breathing to be particularly energetic and my meditation to be very serene. I think it is good for clearing the mind of a busy day's thoughts. Also, is it possible to do it too much?

I have observed that the energy flows much more easily after sadhana although before can amplify sitting practices so both have their value. You will know when you have done it too much, there are physical limitations and you can also get similar symptoms of over-doing as you get sitting practices are over-done.

quote:
I find in an indidivual session at first I can hold that strong charge at the threshold of orgasm for a while, almost a minute. But then everytime I bring myself back up to that point it either wants to go past the point to ejaculation or way back down.

Everyone is individual, but from my perspective what is going on is that we are building energy and if we build too much it wants to go either up or out. It will go up until the point it hits a block and then rebounds in the other direction sometimes taking you by surprise. The more we engage in sitting practices (meditation/ pranayama) over the years, the more tantra feelings will naturally circulate on their own. Look for the good feelings prior to orgasm, to me that is where the magic lies, but it may take a while to get there, not sure, I never tried long enough to know until recently.

Best of luck!