|
|
 |
|
| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
Jack
United Kingdom
305 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 11:54:40 AM
|
Hey,
I recently attempted using the Holosync CDs again - the first couple of days were really dissolving, releasing, deeply relaxing meditations, and then whomph! up came depression, anxiety, low-self-esteem, feelings of unworthiness, unlovability.
Any attempt of doing anything with the feelings does nothing. Doing nothing, well, does nothing. So these feelings are just here now. While I tend to be a bit of a determined hardhead, the intensity of negativity I am experiencing is ruining my daily experience of life - maybe in retreat I would be willing to undergo this, but not here, and not now.
While I am willing to surrender judgement to feelings, it is nothing but damaging to my relationships, job, and self-esteem at the moment.
My plan is to drop meditation until this settles, and drop holosync
for good. Then get my 15/20 minutes twice a day again.
Unfortunately this has put me into a negative spin on life for a few days, it's been difficult.. does anybody know of any good ways to help me snap out of this, or do I just have to wait for the energies to release(through surrender) and subside (through time)?
Hope this finds you all well!
Thanks,
Jack |
|
|
Eitherway
USA
100 Posts |
Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 12:27:23 PM
|
Hi jack,
I don't know anything about the holosync cd that you mentioned but I have also suffered from a lot of negativity, closed loop thought patterns, etc.... over the past couple of years. I also don't know what your prior posts have been about so forgive me if I am way off.
Majority will recommend the deep meditation as developing or shall I say uncovering the witness does wonders with regards to being able to observe negative thought patterns and eventually seeing their source and having them burn up in the light of awareness. The problem seems to be that it can take a while of meditation practice to build up that much inner silence but of course I would still recommend keeping the practice as that is ultimately the best way to "purify" the mind and its thoughts/emotions.
Of course, I would not want you to feel bad until the development of inner silence and the subsequent inquiry , so I would recommed 30-45 minutes or more of aerobic exercise. If the thought of a treadmill or elliptical makes you uncomfortable see if you can find a sport to take the place (might want to consider cricket since the national team does need help- I kid of course). It really does wonders for most people.
Also it sounds like almost a depressive episode that you are going through. If this is the feeling or even just to get a qualified opinion, I would search out a counselor or shrink. Antidepressants do and can work and might allow you to stabilize and feel good enough where yoga and exercise can take over from the medication in a few months.
Lastly, I feel prayer has helped me a lot. It's funny because most of my life I was an agnostic and generally abhorred organized religion. Now I feel I was throwing out the baby with the bath water. I still don't feel particularly drawn towards a lot of religious concepts but I realize that we are all different and the holy books really have their work cut out for them in that respect. I now don't worry about parts of religion that don't resonate with me. My prayer reflects that as I now pray to God largely saying that all I know is that there is a higher power than what I currently identify with (body-mind) and I ask and pray for guidance from this source in general and with particular to how to deal with negative thoughts. I find this helps but again, don't waste time with this if it doesn't resonate.
Like I mentioned above, I don't know the particulars of your situation so please disregard my recommendations if they are off base. Having suffered from negativity and seeing depression ruin a family member's life, I am inclined to not take these things lightly.
Good luck |
 |
|
|
Eitherway
USA
100 Posts |
Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 12:30:27 PM
|
| One more thing Jack, rely on your family and friends. Be honest and vulnerable and you might find the compassion in a friend or family member might just be the right antidote to this period of gloom. |
|
|
|
anthony574
USA
549 Posts |
Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 12:40:24 PM
|
| I think the Witness state is your best bet. I have a bad history of emotional instability and depression that has really subsided in the past year or so, especially with yoga, however, they return every now and then...sometimes full force. the only thing i really can do during these times is to take a moment, focus on my breathing (see if you can notice a change in your breatihng pattern...you may find that during these times your breathing becomes very shallow...almost to the point of stopping), focus on relaxing the tension in your body and especially your face, and try to find the Jack that is behind these emotions...the Jack that is behind Jack. the part of "you" that is simply observing the world through your eyes and is obviously beyond the emotional layer of conciousness. sometimes in certain times, i will actually plunge myself deep into the negative emotions...soaking it up like a cold shower in the sense that it is not inherently negative or unpleasant, Jack the ego just thinks it so. |
|
|
|
Kyman
530 Posts |
Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 12:55:29 PM
|
Same here, there are ups and downs along the way but the trend is undoubtedly positive. I used to suffer so greatly as a youth, and this massive pain had its own personality. Now I joy greatly, and my natural self is slowly re-integrating the energies in me that broke off and became unstable.
Until a limb falls off, I'm the type that says keep going. But that is me. From my point of view, yoga has done nothing but stabilize me, and any symptoms I experienced were brief and pale compared to what much of my life had been like up until my 23rd year.
Unfortunately, these emotional states usually return again and again. They will be less frequent and intense over time though. Many times the source of the emotion is discovered and addressed, it dies off or another cycle of death/rebirth is broken.
The best advice has already been offered, witness the mind re ordering itself. Allow your being to bring up things emotions for the conscious mind to address. Don't 'indulge', just observe and later address. Part of being the witness is observing your behaviors and tendencies. Then you go into deep meditation to address what you've learned about yourself.
Just mind your center, and strengthen defenses in terms of friends to talk to, new activities to enliven the heart and mind, family to spend time with, etc.
If a dark cloud approaches you can go inside your home, stand outside under an umbrella, or go running wild in the storm. Whatever keeps you close to your center. Just watch out for the lightening, it has been known to strike. |
Edited by - Kyman on Sep 21 2007 4:09:27 PM |
|
|
|
Shanti
USA
4854 Posts |
Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 2:37:47 PM
|
Since you posted in this forum I guess you already know .. you need to self pace. :)
I don't know much about Holosync.. so I am not sure what I should say about self pacing.. however, it maybe a good idea to not mix practices (like you said above:)..).
quote:
Jack said:
My plan is to drop meditation until this settles, and drop holosync
for good. Then get my 15/20 minutes twice a day again.
Sounds like a great plan. Though, Yogani generally suggests not to drop meditation completely.. to keep up it even if it just for 5 min twice a day.. But it is your call.
Not sure if you have a tendency towards depression, or if this is just a phase.
If it is a tendency.. there are some posts in this thread that are good
http://www.aypsite.org/forum/topic....&whichpage=1
If it is a phase, just remember, it is purification. It will do its thing and go away. Most times this results in an opening. You have a choice of not attaching to the emotions/feelings that arise during this phase. Just accepting it to be purification and keeping your attitude like that will help you immensely. Just think of it as having a cold virus, you take a break, get some rest and the virus will do its thing (make you sick and miserable).. and go away, leaving you drained and tired.. but its not the end of the world. Similarly, you have purification going on, accept it for that.. take a break, be kind to yourself and it will pass.. leaving you feeling drained (maaaayyyybe)... but lighter and better.
Exercise will help, long walks, aerobics, visit the gym, work in the garden (very grounding). Stay away from spiritual and inspiring (books, groups, friends, music, art, etc.) stuff for a bit. Eat heavier foods. Cut down on your practice big time. Keep yourself busy. Maybe a good time to attack those chores in your house that you were putting off since it involved manual labor. :). Really, anything that will keep you busy and is grounding will help.
Wish you all the best. Hope you feel better soon. |
Edited by - Shanti on Sep 21 2007 2:39:41 PM |
|
|
|
Jack
United Kingdom
305 Posts |
Posted - Sep 21 2007 : 2:39:36 PM
|
| Thank you for the replies. I might have something to say later, but for now, thank you! |
|
|
|
Jack
United Kingdom
305 Posts |
Posted - Sep 23 2007 : 06:30:57 AM
|
Well, the cloud seems to have passed now.
Just had to let things run their own course - I reckon thinking about the feelings, while can lead to a few insights, mostly just spins stories that keep one within that feeling for longer.
Thanks for the posts, guys! |
|
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
| AYP Public Forum |
© Contributing Authors (opinions and advice belong to the respective authors) |
|
|
|
|
Negative emotion
