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Lesson 231 -
Dusty Rooms (Audio)
Date: Tue Aug 24, 2004 7:13pm
New Visitors: It is recommended you read from the beginning of the web archive, as previous
lessons are prerequisite to this one. The first lesson is, "Why
Q: I have been meditating for the past five months now one bizarre thing is
happening in my life nowadays. Previously I used to be a goody goody kind of
person meeting people helping them, happy to be in groups, etc. I had
seemingly good relationships with all and used to be known as a nice person.
Of late I have become too introverted, sort of disinterested in people, just
keeping to myself avoiding people. In fact, my relationship with my family
also is not very good. There is a sort of unsaid sadness hanging round. I am
happy to be with myself, but having people around me is not very
comfortable. People don't understand me any longer. Sounds queer, but
strangely this is what is happening. I really am in a fix. Is it the
meditation? Or is it some deep emotion? Kindly help. I want to be the same
loving nice person I used to be.
And on the technical part of meditation as soon as I put the tip of my
tongue on the palate a sort of salty taste occurs, and soon I start getting
a feeling very strongly that I have to vomit out something and it goes on
till I remove the tongue from the palate. Please tell me what to do. May god
A: Thank you for writing and sharing.
You are that same nice loving person, and even more. What is happening is
purification in your nervous system from practices - a bit more than is
comfortable. It is a temporary disturbance that can be corrected. This
indicates a sensitivity to meditation and other practices you are doing. The
sensitivity is a good thing. It means your nervous system really wants to
open. On the other hand, it also means that you should use good self-pacing
in practices to make sure you don't have so much coming out every day. It
can cause the kinds of symptoms you mentioned - reclusiveness, irritability,
heavy mood, etc. There can be physical symptoms also, as with your kechari.
Think of yourself as living in a big house, and you just discovered several
new rooms. They are full of dust and you want to clean them. If you go in
there swinging a broom every which way, the dust will fly up in great
quantities and you will run out coughing. Better to do a little sweeping at
a time, picking up the dust and disposing of it a bit at time. Then the
rooms can be cleaned without causing a lot of disruption in the house. The
nervous system is like that. When we undertake meditation, we enter into new
areas inside that have not been active much before. If our practices are too
much, there can be a lot of dust kicking up. And that is what can cause the
uncomfortable symptoms, moodiness, etc. It is odd, because our same
practices of meditation and pranayama, done in balance with activity, will
make us more joyful than we were before.
The solution in your case is to scale practices back to have good cleaning
without causing undue disruptions in life.
But first, make sure you are taking plenty of rest coming out of each
meditation. At least 5-10 minute. Lying down during this time is good. This
enables the "dust" of released impurities during practices to dissipate
before we go into activity. If we get up too fast, there can be irritability
or moodiness in activity.
If coming out slower does not help, then consider scaling back your time of
meditation five minutes. It that doesn't work after a few days, try scaling
back another five minutes, and so on. There is a discussion of this process
in lessons #160 & #200.
Also, if you look in the topic
the web site under "self-pacing," you will find more lessons on this
subject. It is a very important skill to develop, especially if a high
sensitivity to practices is there. We all have this at one time or another
along the way toward enlightenment. No one can make the journey without
making adjustments in practices from time to time. The journey of purifying
the nervous system with practices is like driving a car across a varying
landscape. We have to be sensitive to our changing experiences and make
adjustments in our driving accordingly. Comfort is the first measuring rod
to use. If there is discomfort, it is a signal to adjust our practices.
Another thing to consider is spinal breathing. You did not mention it. If
you are not doing any, you might try doing five minutes of it before
meditation each session and see if that helps your emotions during the day.
It will often help if there is an energy imbalance in the nervous system. In
fact, spinal breathing is one of the best remedies for energy imbalances in
our yoga tool kit. So consider that too.
On the discomfort in kechari (tongue going back), this is also a sensitivity
to practice, with lots of impurities coming out when you do that. It is a
good thing, but, again, we want to do it in a measured way that does not
disrupt our life. In time it all clears out and what we have is pure bliss
consciousness and divine ecstasy shining up through us in vast quantities.
Along the way we will have many glimpses of this as it gradually rises to
become a full time reality in our life.
You are that wonderful loving person you have always been. You will be even
more like that, because it is your true nature. Just apply some good
self-pacing in your practices and I think you will find a much smoother
ride. Don't be afraid to experiment with your routine to find the right
balance between practices and your experience in daily living. The journey
should be both progressive and fun. Aim for that...
I wish you all success on your chosen spiritual path.
The guru is in you.
Related Lessons Topic Path
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Note: For detailed instructions on building a
balanced daily practice routine with self-pacing, see the
Eight Limbs of Yoga Book,
and AYP Plus.
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