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bluedolphin
Poland
2 Posts |
 Posted - May 06 2017 : 5:08:14 PM
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It started in july 2015. My life started collapsing after satsang with Cesar Teruel (I was translating him for almoust one hour). I also met with other "awakened people" like Karen Richard but there was no issues after meetings.
First of all I never meditate before satsangs but constantly wondering about "who am I" (first profound self inquire when I was 7)and had some mystical experiences of "home" or "timeless" for few seconds. I fell energy in my hands and legs since I remember. Also I had profound experience during marihuana wehen I felt energy from everythere and no doubts it was me and that felt like multi orgasmic experience. Now I'm almoust 27 and struggling with random effects of kundalini awakening. Just hours after this satsang with Cesar I felt like 9999 volts hit me. I could barely speak but I called emergency and stayed one night in hospital. Doctors said I'm ok except high neurosis, in hospital I felt better and left next day. As you suspect I was wrong, that was only the beggining. Same month my beloved grandfather died, I suffered a lot for 3 months, then energy was weaker then stronger and it lasted for 1,5 year gradually vanishing. In december for the first time I had good experience with energy. I cant put this in words but I saw two energies in blue/celadon colour during weird dream. After all for few months till March I felt good. So recently I stopped masturbation completely and energies hit me again. I cryied without reason, had some panic attack during night (I had panic attacs when I was 7 too with similar dreams about moving stars). Energies hit also crown and third eye chakra. I saw everyday blue dots of energy especially after meditation. Once I felt whole day buzzing in my head and place of third eye and in night white light woke up me and I had strange feeling of new demension but without fear. I had also so vivid dreams about purple colour. Since last two weeks I feel I had lack of memory, feel so exhausted, no motivation, every day is unpredictable, I'm losing interest of everything.., so depressed. So my question is what can help me during this process? I can say for me works be in water,swimming,some good music and exercises,breathing meditation. I must also say I drink alcohol once per week sometimes to much but it somehow chill me. I still consider to remove this but I'm not sure. After drinking I get up "fresh" but not always. Should I masturbate when I feel urge or still be in celibacy? This is also realief for me.. I'm single for whole life except few times I had sex and thats all.. Peace and forgive my language and expression but I really dont know how to transmit my experience. Peace :( |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - May 07 2017 : 04:03:01 AM
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Hi bluedolphin and welcome,
Sorry to hear you have difficulties with kundalini experiences. I feel for you, I had a sudden awakening many years ago and was not knowing what happened or what kundalini was at that moment, it takes time to find balance again.
The most important at this moment for you is to ground, you noticed this already, swimming, walking, being in nature, socializing. Music was for me also an important helper, If the energy was high, I just lie down on the floor and floated on energy and music.
It is not advised to be strictly in celibacy at this moment, you are young, try to find some balance first. Life could be a joy if we are more in balance.
Reading this lesson: http://www.aypsite.org/69.html will give you all information about imbalance, kundalini and what to do.
Do you have a stable daily meditation/yoga routine?
Next to grounding this is important, spinal breathing pranayama and deep meditation will help you to purify. At AYP you can find all you need for a daily meditation routine.
The lessons start here: http://www.aypsite.org/10.html
I advice you to read these two lessons carefully and re-read after some time. Let us know how you are doing or if you have questions. 
Love to you.  
Edit: Alcohol and drugs are not recommended, but you know this already. We could become more sensitive to their effects, which causes more imbalance, the same with food habits, healthy foods will balance the energy.
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Edited by - Charliedog on May 07 2017 05:11:45 AM |
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Dogboy
USA
2197 Posts |
Posted - May 07 2017 : 1:06:07 PM
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Welcome Bluedolphin
As Charliedog says, ground, ground, ground; water and swimming is excellent for that, as is gardening, walking barefoot, being in nature. Service to others helps on two levels, you are reducing energy by the act and others benefit from your actions, positivity rippling forward. Energy can be dispersed through orgasm, but be cautious, extended sexual activity can also ramp it up again.
Kundalini activity can be mistaken for mental issues, but mental issues cannot be dismissed either, so be mindful that either, or both, are possibilities. Only you and your family history can weight the source of your symptoms. A valuable tool at your disposal is to "be" with any symptom, discomfort, dream, or thought that may impose upon you, and then offer it up to your ishta or God. Try not to carry too much internally as you travel along in life, examine it and set it free. If it returns, "rinse & repeat". This learned ritual becomes habit, and over time, how to proceed, the "knowing", becomes crystal clear.
Good luck and report back! |
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bluedolphin
Poland
2 Posts |
Posted - May 07 2017 : 6:16:59 PM
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| I meditate daily, I'm just be with breath, sometimes I inquire if I inspired and have energy, my meditation is max for one hour but recently I'm so tired and my meditation session is even longer. I can say that EVERY day is different, one week like month and I have also problems with memory. Now I dont focus what I'm experiencing cuz this is changing so fast, for example this day I felt so heavy pain in my third eye and feel so weak and weird. I focus on solutions. Today I ran even with low energy. Now I feel much better, so relaxed and calm. I was also lifting, now break since April. Sometimes I play piano or listening my brother plays (we live together). What do you think about vegetarian/vegan diet? Recently I had urges to eat more fruits but removing meat can be problem.. Thank you for advices!! I really needed this! |
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Charliedog
1625 Posts |
Posted - May 08 2017 : 07:32:36 AM
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If I may suggest you stop one or two weeks with meditation. It sounds to me you are overloaded. See how you feel after that week if there is more balance in how you feel daily.
If yes, you can start with for instance 5 minutes of Spinal Breathing Pranayama and your own breathing meditation for 15 minutes twice a day. Preferable in the morning before breakfast and in the evening before dinner or some hours after.
If you would you can change your practice to AYP, did you read the two recommended lessons?
To eat vegetarian or not is personal and also this can change over the years. Me personally never missed meat but changing food habits sounds simple but is not always easy.
From own experience I can say that it is really worth to go to someone who can help you to find out which food is best for your body & mind type (dosha) For instance an Ayurvedic. For me it was a real eyeopener, how my mind became more clear by eating in a different way.
Take your time to invest in knowledge in yourself, we don't have to hurry, take it slowly and steady, one step a time. |
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Kundalini awakening after satsang..Help
