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 Can't get easy with practice
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n/a

26 Posts

Posted - Oct 01 2015 :  09:36:10 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
Hello, wonderful AYPers. I don't know what benefit I can get from this post, but I have to speak up.

I can't get easy with my practice. I never know if I'm "doing it right", you know? I'm sure there are dozens of similar posts, but I'm going to add one more to the barbie. I just can't seem to reconcile my feelings.

On one hand, Yogani talks about how utterly simple the practice is: just keep favoring the mantra. If you find you're off, favor the mantra again. So simple that it will take a ton more teaching to keep it that way.

On the other hand, I've seen all this talk about how to properly do the mantra. You don't hammer it. You don't space it out. You let it do its thing. You don't control it. Let it get fuzzy. But don't do it intentionally.

It's a bit much for me, causing me to always wonder if I'm actually performing Deep Meditation or if I'm spinning my wheels, thinking I'm doing it. For instance, I usually sit and repeat the mantra continuously in my head, trying not to be too strict about pronunciation or clarity. When my thoughts (or strange mental artifacts) carry me away, and I realize this has happened, I try to go back to the mantra. But I'm never sure if I'm "picking it back up" or "favoring" it if it's not clearly I AM (or AYAM or whatever). If it's too fuzzy or indistinct, I feel like I'm still stuck in my thoughts. And if that's the case, I'm not favoring the mantra anymore, am I?

I apologize for the ranting nature of this post. I'm just so flustered. I'm currently on the longest streak I've ever had with continual practice, and it's driving me crazy.

Thank you for your insights.

Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 01 2015 :  10:38:34 AM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
These are good questions. My experience is that the technique is very intuitive. It is very natural, like breathing. Have you ever noticed when you breathe easily and deeply you feel better? Favoring the mantra is like that. The feelings of ease, peace, comfort, and joy are the hints which sustain the practice, and deepen it.

Are there thoughts and feelings which are uncomfortable and even painful that may have to be waded through? Yes. But there is still a gentle style of wading through them, and that style is of acceptance, allowing, and self-pacing. The mantra becomes less like a sledgehammer and more like a dusting brush.

It's a housecleaning, so how you feel after the session will reveal the effectiveness. The session may have some friction and clunkiness, but if there is a feeling of relief and spaciousness afterwards, then you know it's working. That's happened to me quite a few times. Clunky during the beginning, but refining and smoothing out as things progress.

The mantra can mix with thoughts simultaneously, so yes, even if the mantra is fuzzy, there can be easily favoring. There is no need to worry about it being too fuzzy or indistinguishable.

If you have to strain to go back to the mantra, don't go back to the mantra. Very simple. Let the mind run, and the mantra will intertwine gradually and adaptively.

With time, comes understanding. With practice, comes mastery. With favoring and refining, comes stillness.

You're doing good!

Edited by - Bodhi Tree on Oct 01 2015 10:39:59 AM
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n/a

26 Posts

Posted - Oct 01 2015 :  10:51:40 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thank you, Bodhi. That helps a lot. I'll keep favoring and see if the fog of uncertainty dissipates.

One thing, though...if the mantra becomes too fuzzy or indistinguishable, how do I even know if I'm favoring it?

Edited by - n/a on Oct 01 2015 11:12:36 AM
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Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 01 2015 :  12:11:52 PM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
There is no instance when the mantra could become "too fuzzy or indistinguishable". That's an imaginary parameter that doesn't exist. Therefore, if such an occurrence is an impossibility, why would we need to worry about it?

The mantra merges with silence, and the deeper you get, the more automatic the process becomes. Isn't that awesome?
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Bodhi Tree

2972 Posts

Posted - Oct 01 2015 :  1:55:16 PM  Show Profile  Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
P.S. The mantra may indeed become fuzzy and indistinguishable, but it's that "too" part that is a conceptual limitation that is not applicable to the refinement of the mantra. It's kind of like saying: "Silence is too silent." It's an oxymoron and a kind of word game.

Also, when you're deeply immersed in silence, and the mantra has become indistinguishable, there is no more choice to be made about favoring it because there is no more separate awareness between silence, the mantra, and the thinker of the mantra. If separation arises, easily favor. The technique never changes--even if we have been absorbed in a no-mantra, no-thinking zone for an extended period of time and space.
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alecpeace

USA
95 Posts

Posted - Oct 02 2015 :  11:23:20 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
spsalsm, I went through what you're experiencing and yes it was frustrating.

I'm an over-analyzer, so when I first started, I came up with all sorts of "ways" to make sure I'm doing DM right. Ultimately I got very frustrated and just decided to intentionally do DM incorrectly to create a contrast. I would hold on to the mantra, hammer it out, make sure the pronunciation was clear and distinct all the way through DM, focus on it like a laser beam to the point where would get a headache, lol. Then I decided to do it "by the book" and realized where I was wrong. Only be experience we learn, and by experience I mean hindsight seeing what didn't work.

Concerning what you said about mantra becoming fuzzy, here's what I do and I think it's "by the book". I start the mantra with a clear pronunciation as a thought/sound, meaning not at a subvocal level which means I don't use any movement of tongue or throat, so keeping it strictly "in the mind". After only a few minutes there is no need for this any longer as the mantra takes its own path, like water winding its way through cracks, seeking the easiest and most comfortable route. Every meditation is different I found. The mantra becomes fuzzy quickly and is no longer even I AM, just a hum which later turns into a vibration. I drift off into mental constructs or thoughts than pick up the mantra at the level where I left off, and each time I drop it and pick it up I find I go even deeper. The moment I stopped trying to analyze even a single thing about the mantra, thats the time my DM sessions started going really, really deep and I started loosing all sense of time/space/physical location. At the end of my DM sessions, I feel like I'm "waking up" if you sense what I mean. I totally forgot I was sitting in this room meditating, but yet I was fully conscious the whole time and not sleeping. This is a separate consciousness between our awake consciousness and the dream-state.

So, the biggest discovery I've had on the path to getting comfortable with DM, is that when you start analyzing the mantra in any way whatsoever at all, that is when you need to go back to the mantra, as contradictory as that may sound. And by analyzing I mean thinking "about" the mantra instead of repeating it as it comes. The only time I control the mantra is when I start DM for the first minute or so to get it going, but that's it, after that it's completely unpredictable what will happen.
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Dogboy

USA
2198 Posts

Posted - Oct 02 2015 :  2:11:46 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
The only time I control the mantra is when I start DM for the first minute or so to get it going, but that's it, after that it's completely unpredictable what will happen.


Well said.
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n/a

26 Posts

Posted - Oct 05 2015 :  12:27:57 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thank you very much for your insights, alecpeace.

Sean
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n/a

26 Posts

Posted - Oct 12 2015 :  12:16:49 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Would you believe me if I told you that if I let the mantra do what it's going to do by itself, the pronunciation stays clear almost the whole way through?
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Dogboy

USA
2198 Posts

Posted - Oct 12 2015 :  3:17:27 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I'm a believer . I never notice much change in the mantra personally, nor do I play much attention to it as it loops on and on. This doesn't mean there is nothing is going on 'behind the scene', and for your peace of mind, you are not spinning your wheels. Change may be in the pace of glacier or the flash of lightening; most likely it falls somewhere in between.
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SeySorciere

Seychelles
1532 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2015 :  04:33:42 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
@alecpeace - excellent summary/insight. I particularly like "like water finding its way thru cracks..."
@spsalsm - no two sittings is the same. Do not expect or prefer the mantra to be one way or another, although it is true that over time, the mantra will quickly lose pronunciation after the first thought and just become a vibration.

Sey
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alecpeace

USA
95 Posts

Posted - Oct 13 2015 :  09:51:47 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by spsalsm

Would you believe me if I told you that if I let the mantra do what it's going to do by itself, the pronunciation stays clear almost the whole way through?



quote:
Originally posted by Dogboy

I never notice much change in the mantra personally



Just goes to show how different DM is for everyone. For me, the mantra does change quit a bit most of the time. Towards the end of DM, it's just an unrecognizable hum/vibration. But like Sey said, no two sittings are ever the same for me. Sometimes the mantra just doesn't want to melt and thats fine.

Edited by - alecpeace on Oct 13 2015 09:56:09 AM
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Jayleno214

USA
87 Posts

Posted - Nov 27 2015 :  6:08:17 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Let me tell you that i too posted posts like yours asking for clarification and at one point accusing yogani of holding back information so that he wont get sued. (i now realize all the info is here, yet as evidenced by this post and by experience; it could still be described simpler, and i think i will give it a shot).


1. You repeat the mantra. That part is inevitably simple to understand. No confusion here.

1a. There are many ways the mantra can change yet still be the mantra, whether it be the original IAM or the versions that follow, they'll get long, short, soft, hard, but it'll be within the confines of the pronounciation " AYAM" . this point should clear some of the attempts at describing the 'fuzzy-ness'- point. (ex. 'AAAYYYYAAAAAM' '[SUPERFAST]AYAM' [KINDA LONGER THAN USUAL]'AAYYAMM' [SOFT LIKE A WISPER]'AYAM')

2. The important part is to pay attention to the mantra. Because make no mistake about it, you could be repeating it and not be paying it any attention.

2a. here is where the point of taking it easy and being easy with it and the favoring it try to describe. there is a degree from 0 to 100 of how much attention you can pay it.
2b. ideally in the perfect body and world we'd pay it 100% attention (if fact i believe its our destination) and at some points in my meditation I do so, but at times your body cannot due to obstructions pay it 100% attention and at those times you sort of have to back off on the attention {not repetition}{thats where favoring it comes in, or the'come back to a level thats comfortable'-phrase tries to describe}
2c. you'll know when you need to back off by either 1. your body is too tense or 2. your so full of pleasure ur gonna pop.



if nothing else take this away from my post:

if you are repeating the mantra even without attention, you still are purifying yourself.
its the amount of attention that you apply to the mantra that determines the amount of purification you undergo.

let me give you a tip: if you find it "hard" or unpleasant, then you are most likely doing it right. but dont let this statement give you the impression that you can 'kill' yourself with practice and call it 'right'. use common sense.

let me know if you need clarification! ive been following this for 5 years and im grateful as can be for this resource. glad to be a contributor!
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alecpeace

USA
95 Posts

Posted - Nov 29 2015 :  12:06:46 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
Originally posted by Jayleno214



there is a degree from 0 to 100 of how much attention you can pay it (mantra).

if you are repeating the mantra even without attention, you still are purifying yourself.
its the amount of attention that you apply to the mantra that determines the amount of purification you undergo.




Interesting concept. I will meditate on this.

According to AYP, you're attention is either on the mantra, or it is not. If it is not, you return to the mantra. But, the question of whether purification is still occurring at some level in that "grey zone" has not been addressed. The "grey zone" being thoughts+automatic mantra repetition. My guess would be no, since you wouldn't stay in the "grey zone" for more than a second if you do AYP properly.
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Jayleno214

USA
87 Posts

Posted - Dec 06 2015 :  3:13:08 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
i digress. forgive me for my bad advice.

i must point out that i wrote this on a time when i was experiencing very nice ecstatic scenery, which i managed to bring about through the described technique of paying it attention. It undoubtedly produces scenery but i could not sustain it, not to mention i was no longer meditating for the sake of repeating the mantra, because i was attached to the feel good feelings.

as i reflect on what i just experienced i realize that what i was doing and what i posted above could be accurately described as "attaching" oneself to the mantra, something the AYP advises not to do. It took me 5 days to find out this procedure is wrong, and i did so only because i was becoming more clogged (more tense), less blissful in activity and during practice after the plateau of ecstacy that occured in the first 3 days.

i now believe the proper procedure is to repeat the mantra back to back speedily without paying it any attention, otherwise described as 'attaching' and 'holding on' to the mantra, while not doing it too fast, nor too slow. Fast enough back-to-back repetition produces some ecstacy and too fast back-to-back makes me tense, with ecstasy coming up randomly, not minding it as per instructions.

the difference from this post to my original post is that before i would pay the mantra attention regardless of my tense level, in fact in the presence of the ecstasy i was unaware of my tenseness. I couldnt keep this up so it must be improper procedure. now whenever i realize i am mindful of anything other than the mantra i simply repeat the mantra again, and not pay attention to the current repetition as before.
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Christi

United Kingdom
4373 Posts

Posted - Dec 07 2015 :  3:04:07 PM  Show Profile  Visit Christi's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:

According to AYP, you're attention is either on the mantra, or it is not. If it is not, you return to the mantra. But, the question of whether purification is still occurring at some level in that "grey zone" has not been addressed. The "grey zone" being thoughts+automatic mantra repetition. My guess would be no, since you wouldn't stay in the "grey zone" for more than a second if you do AYP properly.


Hi Alecpeace,

That's right. Deep meditation is not about thinking about things whilst the mantra goes on automatically in the background. It is about easily favouring the mantra with our attention. So if we find ourselves lost in thought, we easily favour the mantra instead.


quote:
i digress. forgive me for my bad advice.

i must point out that i wrote this on a time when i was experiencing very nice ecstatic scenery, which i managed to bring about through the described technique of paying it attention. It undoubtedly produces scenery but i could not sustain it, not to mention i was no longer meditating for the sake of repeating the mantra, because i was attached to the feel good feelings.

as i reflect on what i just experienced i realize that what i was doing and what i posted above could be accurately described as "attaching" oneself to the mantra, something the AYP advises not to do. It took me 5 days to find out this procedure is wrong, and i did so only because i was becoming more clogged (more tense), less blissful in activity and during practice after the plateau of ecstacy that occured in the first 3 days.

i now believe the proper procedure is to repeat the mantra back to back speedily without paying it any attention, otherwise described as 'attaching' and 'holding on' to the mantra, while not doing it too fast, nor too slow. Fast enough back-to-back repetition produces some ecstacy and too fast back-to-back makes me tense, with ecstasy coming up randomly, not minding it as per instructions.

the difference from this post to my original post is that before i would pay the mantra attention regardless of my tense level, in fact in the presence of the ecstasy i was unaware of my tenseness. I couldnt keep this up so it must be improper procedure. now whenever i realize i am mindful of anything other than the mantra i simply repeat the mantra again, and not pay attention to the current repetition as before.


Hi Jayleno214,

There is no particular speed given to the repetition of the mantra, neither fast nor slow. The instructions are to simply begin repeating the mantra and then let it go as it will.

Whenever we realize that we are off the mantra, we easily favour the mantra with our attention. That does not mean to attach to the mantra, but rather to simply easily favour it. So it is something that is very subtle and gentle.

As the mind becomes more calm and silent, the mantra will naturally become less clearly pronounced and "fuzzy". It is fine to let that happen. You may also find that as the mantra refines to stillness, it will disappear completely at times. That is fine too. Simply keep coming back to it whenever you realise you are off it and come back to it at the level of faintness and fuzziness that you were at before you lost it.

The instruction to repeat the mantra "back-to-back" is simply the way you begin the practice. It means that you are not deliberately putting a pause in between one mantra repetition and the next. But once you are under-way, you simply let the mantra go as it will. If you find that you lose the mantra into silence and you then realize you are off it, again you come back to it, repeating it back-to-back and again let it go as it will.

Don't be looking for experiences such as ecstasy during meditation. Meditation is not about producing effects or experiences, it is simply about following the meditation procedure.

Gradually, the mind will come to silence and stillness and samadhi.


Christi
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SeySorciere

Seychelles
1532 Posts

Posted - Dec 08 2015 :  02:36:20 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Dear Jayleno,

When you become aware that tenseness has crept in - take a moment to release it (a deep breath, release, usually does the trick) then back to favoring the mantra - light and easy.

Sey

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Jayleno214

USA
87 Posts

Posted - Dec 13 2015 :  10:03:24 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Christy and Sey.

This; me going back and forth between paths is funny methinks.

Experience in daily activity is the ultimate deciding factor yes?

if so: practice with ecstacy gives me unparalleled love and acceptance from my family and strangers in daily activity.

From the last post to now, I added Mulabhanda and Im glad i did. I rationalized that since I had already been doing 5 years of DM (with occasional upgrades that i eventually downgraded due to being ((i now realize: overly overly careful)) i was A-OK upgrading to mulabhanda ( had 3 months of continuous SB till now ((and previous times with additional SB long-term practice)))

i was greeted with pleasure and more pleasure. all i keep thinking is i wasted 4 years of potential pleasure. ( though i really dont think so because i know my DM discipline helps with the mulabhanda repeatedly going to stillness)

this pleasure is refined tenfold and increased ever so sweetly once i begin DM. I withdraw my digression and reassert that paying it attention is the way to go. Doing so produces pleasure, not paying it attention and merely repeating it (which i think might be considered 1-49% attention) does not catalyze the pleasure.

So looking back at the Original poster, which i feel is like looking back 5 years at myself ( i posted numerous times with the same question)

I now resay this:

1. the apparent nothingness you think you are doing with your DM will help tremendously with mulabanda. Ill leave it at that. ok ill say that the pleasure is distracting and the going back to what you will yourself to is key and easier said than done (unless you got time of DM under your sleeve) this also helps in all aspects of life. (it does in mine, every day)

2. just say the mantra, but thats one half of the equation. and its really that simple. the power lies in its sound and thats also the same half of the equation.

3. pay it attention, this is the second half of the equation, and is a power of itself. now as i said before i stand by it again you can pay it attention in degrees as in my experience.

4. Thats it for DM.

This is perfect dm.

after you add sb, and mulabhanda the experience during DM changes but the game stays the same, and i might add the prize gets bigger.


Now how long have you "spsalsm" been doing DM?
because in retrospect these same moments of desperation i perceive in your post is the same kind of bhakti i underwent about 2 weeks ago that prompted me to "spark" my practice and pay it 100% attention thus leading to temporary ecstacy. You are building up the necessary bhakti (desire, longing, and laser-will to change) required for the next practices.

theres a saying along the lines of "displeasure with your current state is required to change" or something along those lines. I think i can relate the frustrating moments of noneventful DM to that quote.


Please correct me if im wrong. But like i said above, if experience in daily activity is the deciding factor, then im doing just fine! (more like perfect) (i would like to add that for the last 5 years of AYP i would shy away from the tiniest pleasure occuring in practice (by pacing my attention, or repetition) with the belief that i would overload or thinking i was attached to the pleasure, but the pleasure is there now like the sun at 1PM during practice, its just part of it, right?)
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SeySorciere

Seychelles
1532 Posts

Posted - Dec 14 2015 :  04:23:09 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Jayleno - if you are reaping the benefits in daily life, then indeed you are doing it right!!


Sey



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Christi

United Kingdom
4373 Posts

Posted - Dec 14 2015 :  08:51:10 AM  Show Profile  Visit Christi's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:

Please correct me if im wrong. But like i said above, if experience in daily activity is the deciding factor, then im doing just fine! (more like perfect) (i would like to add that for the last 5 years of AYP i would shy away from the tiniest pleasure occuring in practice (by pacing my attention, or repetition) with the belief that i would overload or thinking i was attached to the pleasure, but the pleasure is there now like the sun at 1PM during practice, its just part of it, right?)



Hi Jeyleno,

Yes, at a certain stage, pleasure becomes a normal part of the experience during practices. There is nothing wrong with that and it is part of the scenery that happens along the path. You can enjoy it whilst it is there. We don't need to cling to it either. Sometimes it won't be there and that is fine too.

In Deep Meditation it is recommended not to use mulabandha, unless it is occurring spontaneously. This is so that we are not distracted in any way from the simple procedure of coming back to the mantra again and again, whenever we realize we are off it. So even though using mulabandha during meditation would be very pleasurable in your case, it is advised not to do it deliberately. This is because ultimately, spiritual practices are not a process of pleasure seeking. It is about much more than that. It is about Self-realization. Pleasure, like other things, can be a distraction in the process of coming to abide in the Self. So with meditation, we are primarily cultivating inner silence and letting everything else be as it will, neither deliberately creating anything or deliberately pushing anything away. By cultivating inner silence, we come to abide in the witness. Through continuous abiding in the witness state, we come to rest in the Self. Resting in the Self, is bliss and it is blissful whether pleasure is experienced or not. So Self-knowledge is the real goal and purpose of meditation.

In the short term, the process of bringing the mind to stillness and silence in meditation, may not feel as good, or be nearly as exiting as the experiences of ecstasy, that can be produced by other practices such as pranayama or the mudras and bandhas. In the long term, pleasure and ecstasy can only take us so far on the path. Eventually, it becomes primarily about the cultivation of samadhi and about the merging of ecstasy and stillness in samadhi.

Christi
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Jayleno214

USA
87 Posts

Posted - Dec 18 2015 :  9:52:06 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
thanks for your responses.

to clarify, i do not introduce mulabandha voluntarily during DM, nor do i pay it attention. It does incite itself however, when i begin DM and favor the mantra. The more i favor it the more it incites and the more pleasure i experience.

I have a question in regards to selfpacing, should I remain true to DM and favor the mantra when thoughts of selfpacing the pleasure arise, and therefore continue building the pleasure? (excluding when I feel orgasm is coming up, in which case i self pace by pausing the mantra repetition) I mean self pacing as in should i stay at subtle experiences of pleasure by favoring it accordingly(softly) or should i favor it 'naturally'/'above all else' and allow the full blown unadulterated pleasure to arise freely?

I ask because I keep reminiscing about the housecleaning lesson on the 'slower the better' approach.

The pleasure feels so good and I rationalize that im doing nothing wrong because its coming up as a result of proper DM. Keep in mind no discomfort is present. I just would like to follow the surest path.

Thanks in advance for your response.
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Dogboy

USA
2198 Posts

Posted - Dec 19 2015 :  07:21:25 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
quote:
thanks for your responses. to clarify, i do not introduce mulabandha voluntarily during DM, nor do i pay it attention. It does incite itself however, when i begin DM and favor the mantra. The more i favor it the more it incites and the more pleasure i experience.

I have a question in regards to selfpacing, should I remain true to DM and favor the mantra when thoughts of selfpacing the pleasure arise, and therefore continue building the pleasure? (excluding when I feel orgasm is coming up, in which case i self pace by pausing the mantra repetition) I mean self pacing as in should i stay at subtle experiences of pleasure by favoring it accordingly(softly) or should i favor it 'naturally'/'above all else' and allow the full blown unadulterated pleasure to arise freely?


As mentioned, the pleasurable feelings are a result of the purification process and are bound to arise. The trick when this happens is there is a tendency to incite these feelings, to encourage them as they arise, and you may not even fully aware you are doing that. Whenever pleasure arises in my DM, I inquire "am I truly surrendering?" and more times than not, I feel my perineum relax slightly. This does not mean the pleasurable feelings disappear, but I does affirm I am not inciting them. Simply return to the mantra and be with whatever arises. If it becomes too much of a chore or distraction, perhaps end the session early. Self pacing means to cut back on practice whenever discomfort arises, so it that manner, this is a form of self pacing, but not the true definition of self pacing as outlined in the lessons, when one cuts back the breadth and duration of practices when their body discomfort or mood is affecting everyday life. Hope that clarifies for you.
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Jayleno214

USA
87 Posts

Posted - Dec 19 2015 :  11:50:47 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Oh no! chore or distraction? , no way. Its the best 20 minutes of my day! Better than sex i dare say. There is another lesson that talks about finding a middle path between the pleasure, a" not too high not too low" recommendation. I don't feel I'm going too high, but I'm the student here and i know i know not the path as others do.

Perhaps selfpacing was the incorrect verb.

I know i can curb the pleasure but it would be at the expense of remaining loyal(favoring) the mantra. Because the more i favor the mantra the more pleasure arises. No discomfort. So I'm asking which the BEST path?
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Dogboy

USA
2198 Posts

Posted - Dec 19 2015 :  12:56:50 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Favor the mantra. These sensations are transitory, a phase. When they diminish you will miss them, perhaps wonder what you are now doing wrong, maybe try to replicate them; only then will you realize how attached you've become. What to do then? Nothing but gently favor the mantra, and present with wherever your practice has brought you. This is your best course of action.
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Jayleno214

USA
87 Posts

Posted - Dec 19 2015 :  2:15:45 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
What you said makes sense and i pick up a "this too shall pass" message from it. I wholeheartedly agree and would like to thank you for your response. I truly value this website, the information and the contributors.

I will continue meditation until my last day because i see benefit from it even when i experience no ecstasy as i did the major part of my last five years. So please divulge information freely, for I will not flake away.

You alluded to a word that Iam referring to and is the core of my question." Gently"

Before mulabandha it was always gentle except when I was filled with bhakti and would focus on the mantra "100%" which would incite ecstacy but was always short-lived (i think was because i was lacking the prana awakening practices, i would tire out with no oomph, no more gas, no more bhakti to favor it 100%.) Now with mulabandha it's a whole lot simpler to favor it 100%, i feel like im expanding into it and the pleasure is right beside this. No more short lived bhakti. It's definitly a booster and the mantra is naturally favored wholistically, easily.

So now that you touched on gently i reiterate: should i go against the natural newly available bhakti and dial back to gently favoring to produce less pleasure or just continue the process according to my bhakti ( theres tons of bhakti, no discomfort)?
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Dogboy

USA
2198 Posts

Posted - Dec 19 2015 :  8:29:01 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Try it one way one day, and then the other way another day (sounds like lyrics!), it's all trial and error, Mr Jay, you are the captain of your ship. You will then know more than you do right now What works for Johnie may not work for Jane.
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