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 Satsang Cafe - General Discussions on AYP
 Feeling Alienated
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tomllee

USA
51 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  2:30:55 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Message
My last couple of posts, usually queries of some kind, went largely ignored. It made me wonder if, somewhere along the line, I had said something (or perhaps not said something) that alienated the members who routinely try to answer questions in a helpful way. It also made we wonder about if perhaps my ego were merely over active. Maybe what I asked about was just totally boring and unworthy of response? Am I being overly sensitive here or have I tripped up in some way? I have found the validation of experience by more experienced meditators very helpful in forging ahead.

If I've messed up somehow, is there a way get back into the good graces of those who usually try to respond to questions in a helpful way. Maybe I should back out of posting at all?

Etherfish

USA
3615 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  2:38:47 PM  Show Profile  Visit Etherfish's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Yes, overly sensitive! Meditate a lot, post a little.
Which ones were ignored?
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tomllee

USA
51 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  3:15:37 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks for responding, Etherfish. I've posted as Tommy and as tomllee (having forgotten and been unable to locate my password). One was about the trunklike projection from my ajna that whipped around so hard I could feel the wind it stirred up, the last was about the involuntary mouth movements. I can accept that I am being hypersensitive - don't like it and feel a bit foolish, but I can accept it. Just goes to show how far I have to go...but I am really enjoying (most of) the journey! I understand that, basically, the appropriate response to just about anything I would have to say about my own journey would be "That, too, will pass...just keep meditating and pacing yourself and don't get caught up in the scenery".

But it's still nice to communicate with people on this list from time to time and that's always a part of my reason for posting anything.
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Etherfish

USA
3615 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  3:52:07 PM  Show Profile  Visit Etherfish's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Don't take it personally. People don't respond for a variety of reasons. Most often because they haven't experienced anything like what you are writing about.

This is quite common.
The same path is different for everyone! Your experiences relate to your karma, not the path. Sometimes only you can find meaning in your experiences.

So just keep meditating - eventually you will find common ground.
You need to cultivate devotion and desire for your highest ideal. This will keep you from feeling alienated.

Edited by - Etherfish on Sep 25 2010 3:55:17 PM
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faileforever

USA
189 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  3:55:43 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hello tomllee,
I dont think any question is 'totally boring or unworthy of a response' Im new to posting on the forums but I spend HOURS reading them, other peoples experiences, thoughts and questions. By asking, you not only gain yourself some insight but others are out there probably experiencing similiar things with similiar questions on their minds. I hope that you continue to post and know that even if there isnt a response there are people out there *waves hand* who are reading your questions and thoughts.
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tomllee

USA
51 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  4:19:55 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
faileforever and Etherfish...thanks to you both. I deeply appreciate that you both took the time and consideration to respond in such an affirming way. Etherfish, I will do what I can to do better at cultivating devotion and desire for my highest ideals! Thanks also for the information about the part Karma plays.

I see now that my whole post was, as much as anything else, a matter of seeking community and connectedness.

Edited by - tomllee on Sep 25 2010 4:27:02 PM
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Etherfish

USA
3615 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  4:25:02 PM  Show Profile  Visit Etherfish's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Look up "bhakti" in the "yoga FAQ" link at the top of this page.
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Shanti

USA
4842 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  4:34:08 PM  Show Profile  Visit Shanti's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi Tomllee,
I am sorry you feel you are being ignored.
That is not the intention of anyone here.

If you have not got a reply, it's because people really don't have an answer.

Hopefully someone will have replies to your queries.
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tomllee

USA
51 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  4:59:22 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
I think I have a decent handle on the importance of bhakti, it's probably the doing something daily in keeping with my spiritual ideal that is lacking, Etherfish. Thanks for making me do more serious thinking on the matter. Shanti, thanks for your kind words. I have to take responsibility for my feelings, just needed to get a handle on whether I might have committed some kind of social error at some point...I think I do more of that (make more social errors) these days and don't much trust myself. Checking it out and getting honest responses like I've gotten so far help allot!
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Etherfish

USA
3615 Posts

Posted - Sep 25 2010 :  5:40:10 PM  Show Profile  Visit Etherfish's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
What matters is the intensity of the feeling of devotion, and how often you feel that.
Don't worry about social errors! If I worried about social errors I've made in the past, I would be a nervous wreck! Just learn and move on.
I know you start thinking about such things; but you have to stop yourself before long because it gets you nowhere.
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Holy

796 Posts

Posted - Sep 26 2010 :  11:55:14 AM  Show Profile  Visit Holy's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
As everyone said, your questions and sharings are read and if no answers come: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-rJ-6hBfSo

Edited by - Holy on Sep 26 2010 12:15:10 PM
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LittleTurtle

USA
342 Posts

Posted - Sep 26 2010 :  4:49:31 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Hi tomilee, I read your post about the mouth movements and I was curious because I have not had any knowledge of that and I noted that there were no responses, so I figured it was something uncommon. And I don't think you are over sensitive. It can feel odd to post sometimes when you are unsure of the kinds of effects one gets from yoga practices. I used to post on one of the Yogananda boards and because I freely posted my yoga experiences I was largely ignored for various reasons, mostly because they're progress was so slow, ha ha. I once spoke to an SRF nun about some spontaneous yoga I was having and she looked at me like I was a looney, she had no concept of what I was experiencing. Anyway, I agree that nearly all posts are read but sometimes not answered if no one has a direct experience or opinion. I'll happily read anything you care to share with the forum.
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Etherfish

USA
3615 Posts

Posted - Sep 26 2010 :  6:20:43 PM  Show Profile  Visit Etherfish's Homepage  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Yes I used to post on a Yogananda listserver also. They were very strict about what you talked about, and it HAD to be Yogananda. I mentioned AYP a couple times and they warned me not to talk about that, even though I was getting good results with AYP. Then I mentioned something else another time, and they discontinued my membership for some trumped up reason I wasn't guilty of! Several people tried to contact me later from the Yogananda group saying they enjoyed my posts.
Anyway no great loss. It's nice to have an open forum, where nobody is idolized. Just happens to be the best system also, but that's beside the point.
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tomllee

USA
51 Posts

Posted - Sep 28 2010 :  1:56:10 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote  Get a Link to this Reply
Thanks to everyone for responding. How wonderfully reassuring you are! I am sneaking up on two years at meditating AYP style and the experiences get stronger and more beautiful every day. Yet the power of the energy movement in itself can be frightening and some of the spontaneous movements that can happen when I meditate and just sit with the energy in sambavi and root lock before meditating can be a bit frightening...but not enough to convince me it's time to end the journey. I find that comments from folk like all of you help me past the occasional hurdle. Can't thank you enough!

Plus it is really nice to know that people read my postings even if I never hear from them because my experiences do not resonate or ring familiar.

I know I am in great company on this very unique path.
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