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rkishan
USA
102 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 29 2016 : 3:12:34 PM
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Thanks. Yes, Thanks!
For what? To who? For everyone and for everything. Everyone that is part of AYP from the start to the person that just came across AYP today. Also to everyone that is not part of AYP and never heard of it. A wise man once said that he learns something everyday from everyone that he encounters in his life, some teach him what to do, and some others teach him, what not to do (in life). He went on to state that, those that teach him what not to do, are just as important as those that teach him what to do. I feel this way now.
I consider myself lucky (or was it destined?) that I found AYP when it was formed in early stages. When I look back, it has helped my life in several ways. Some positive changes were visible in short time frame and other changes were/are subtle, which happened(ing) over the years.
So far, after numerous attempts, I am unable to consistently do the core AYP sitting practices twice a day, due to over-sensitivity (that seems to happen in small minority) which Yogani has addressed really well in lessons. He has provided clear instructions and alternates for those who encounter this problem. Still, for whatever reason, even a 10 minute session once in a while, takes me in deep. By itself that is great, but sadly it produces some unpleasant effects for me. I have vented my frustrations here because of this --my inability to do the practices. I even openly voiced some doubts in my mind about the feasibility of meditation for one and all. Right now, I feel that voicing my mind's turbulence out here was wrong. Even when I vented my frustrations and inability in a way that I see now as not constructive; people here still read it and responded kindly. If I have not learned something from that, I doubt I will learn anything ever.
Perhaps I could apply deep meditation and other techniques one day. My error as I see now, was I translated "not being able to do meditation then" as "I may never be able to do meditate ever". I am not in a hurry anymore. Despite not being able to do the sitting practices of AYP every day, I have to admit in all honesty, that AYP changed my life positively in a profound way -- not just once, but in several ways/times. I realize that I have been doing AYP all along and benefiting from it, even though, I continue to struggle with over-sensitivity and can't do the core sitting practices, twice a day.
This is a shift in my attitude and inner change. I used to come here primarily for "my" practice, "my" liberation, "my" concerns or "my" whatever. Participating and helping others was secondary. Even while genuinely attempting to help others or participate, somehow "my" progress or "about me" was more important. I am not saying it is wrong. I am just observing it.
I just happened to notice that some post I made several years back helped some one. He came back and thanked. I did not know that this post helped some one and just found out today, after years. Similarly, I have received help from many. This made me realize (make this post), that my interests in coming here need not be primarily about "ME". If some techniques are not working great for me now, that's fine, I don't translate that as "I am doomed" anymore.
Something I said somewhere at sometime helped some one in some way. Perhaps the way I said it then mattered to this person. When I read that old post of mine, I am not sure if I would express it today in the same way I did then. Nevertheless it seemed to have helped someone at that point.
I am not claiming that I am above selfishness now or selfishness is wrong. Just felt like expressing gratitude and share, the understanding that came to me over the course of long time --that coming to AYP (or any action for that matter) doesn't have to be primarily about me. It can be for a collective good --"for all of us".
Hence the Thanks to one and all!
sarve bhavantu sukhinah (may all attain ever lasting peace --my translation) |
Edited by - rkishan on Dec 29 2016 3:45:51 PM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4369 Posts |
Posted - Dec 29 2016 : 5:47:26 PM
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Hi rkishan,
Good to hear about the gratitude that you feel for the AYP practices. I was also lucky enough to find them in the early days.
With regards to increased sensitivity, there are practices that can be done even if you cannot meditate for 10 minutes. SBP can be scaled back to just a few minutes, or even just a few breaths if necessary. If even a few breaths is too much, the basic Alternate Nostril Breathing (without breath retention) can be done for a few minutes each day. This will help to keep the process of purification going. Service to others whilst surrendering the fruits of the actions (seva) can also be done. This will help to purify the heart and prepare the whole vessel for awakening when the time is right. And then of course there are grounding practices, which can be done as much as you like each day. You may find that the more you do to ground yourself each day, the sooner you will be able to take up the core AYP practices again.
It is a stage on the path that many people experience and it normally does not last very long when the focus is on grounding.
Christi
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rkishan
USA
102 Posts |
Posted - Dec 29 2016 : 7:06:04 PM
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Hi Christi,
Yes, I learned that even little bit of deep breathing --even few breaths-- as you pointed out helps a lot. Whether it is SBP or alternate nostril. I have to be careful to do very little in moderation, otherwise I run into over-sensitivity.
Service to others surrendering the fruits of action is another great point that you brought up. Something I need to be mindful or keep reminding myself --just not in service, but in other activities also I can surrender the fruit of actions.
I understand why you relate grounding with over-sensitivity. I agree 100% with the way you relate them and explained. About the purification part, I agree but I am not going to actively seek it. I feel that the things that you mentioned result in purification without me having to make conscious effort to purify.
I am more grounded these days compared to the way I was. This is why I am not in a big rush anymore. I see this phase now as, "this too shall pass". I should be able to meditate some day, it's going to happen inevitably. The restless longing for it is gone, plus seeing it as THE solution to all problems life presents. I have read whatever we seek with desperation moves away from us. This seems to be true.
So, let meditations and other advanced practices happen, when they happen. Doesn't mean that I am going to just sit by and wait without any action on my part. Everything you have mentioned about service, grounding and continuing the purification process are all very thoughtful. Thanks for taking the time to read my post and provide such insight with clarity. I will continue to walk the journey in the way I can.
--Ram
PS: I have a question for you and others on the meditation with some relevance to what we are discussing here. It will be off topic here, so I will post in "Deep Meditation" forum when I can. In nutshell, I just wonder if few breaths can help me so much (which it took me years to realize), could few set minutes of meditation twice a day be of any value at all? |
Edited by - rkishan on Dec 29 2016 8:07:08 PM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4369 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2016 : 12:18:18 PM
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quote:
I just wonder if few breaths can help me so much (which it took me years to realize), could few set minutes of meditation twice a day be of any value at all?
Hi Rkishan,
That does not seem too off-topic, as we are discussing what we can do even if we cannot sit for 10 minutes a day.
I would say that sitting quietly, even for a few minutes a day can be useful, especially if it helps to serve as a reminder of what we are doing. It means that we are keeping up the habit of meditation, and also remembering that we are on an inward journey.
And yes, with karma yoga, the fruits of all action can be surrendered, not only actions done in service to others.
Here are a few other things that we can be doing other than karma yoga, if we are not able to sit:
1. Asana practice: This will help to keep the body flexible for when we are able to sit again and also purify the nadis and chakras.
2. Observing the yamas and niyamas: These can be perfected to the level of thought (subtle level) and not only of action (gross level).
3. Self-inquiry practice (jnana yoga): Even if we cannot sit for 10 minutes, we can still engage in self-inquiry for periods of time during the day.
4. Bhakti yoga: The remembering of the divine.
So there is a lot we can be doing to keep a forward momentum going on the path. Then when we find we are able to sit again, it will be with a more purified mind and body than before and our practice will be much easier.
Christi |
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rkishan
USA
102 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2016 : 4:03:22 PM
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Hi Christi,
I can't really express my gratitude. It just feels like, you read my mind or grasped the core issue and addressed it in a way that is extremely useful/valuable to me.
I got the answer that is entirely convincing to me. Not simply because it affirms what I wanted to do. The part where you stated that it will keep the habit of practice going and the forward momentum, feels truly valid. The solution you suggested is also holistic, well rounded, covering aspects like asanas, bhakti and karma yoga. Lately, I forgot to give importance to the asana part. I was seeing this sitting practice (at least meditation & pranayama) as either *all or nothing*. I am learning that there can be a middle of the road workaround that can keep me going.
You also saved me from creating a new topic on the deep meditation forum  . Thank you.
--Ram |
Edited by - rkishan on Dec 30 2016 4:25:52 PM |
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Christi
United Kingdom
4369 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2016 : 5:11:38 PM
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Dogboy
USA
2197 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2016 : 5:13:47 PM
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Ram
Thank you for your return and testimony. AYP was my first exposure to meditation and this program has truly changed my whole perspective by awakening arousal within the deepest of silence, in three short years no less! I am blessed that I am not over sensitive based on some paths outlined in this forum. My life is very busy partly because I have a child with special needs, and AYP knowledge has provided me with so many tools to cope, to discover, to appreciate, to love, to surrender...yoga has truly become a constant, there is always an opportunistic moment for grounding, asana, pranayama, and service throughout the day. Samyama has taught me how to share my progress. I am definately happy as is; enlightenment doled out in bite sized morsels.
AYP found me for I don't recall looking for it.
Your post is overflowing with gratitude, experience, and surrender; you have provided us love and service by testifying. Maybe you are over sensitive because of past life progress. Your spiritual flywheel is working overtime. |
Edited by - Dogboy on Dec 30 2016 5:14:57 PM |
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rkishan
USA
102 Posts |
Posted - Jan 01 2017 : 12:54:54 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Dogboy
Ram
AYP found me for I don't recall looking for it.
Your post is overflowing with gratitude, experience, and surrender; you have provided us love and service by testifying. Maybe you are over sensitive because of past life progress. Your spiritual flywheel is working overtime.
Dogboy,
I should agree. I guess AYP or spirituality found me or we found each other. This is why I put "destined?" in parenthesis.
You are right on money about the overflowing part. I have to confess something pretty traumatic happened to me(us) in the recent past. Not directly to me, but to a loved one. The family is still dealing with the reverberations and repurcursions.
Oh boy, I can go through many problems. When we see some one else suffer(suddenly), and we realize that we are helpless to do something about it...... That was(is) a huge lesson for me.
I guess life has it's own way of teaching us. Few days after the event happened(was still on shock), I was asking "why?", "why now?", "why us?", fully knowing that there is no answer to the why questions. I see now, there is a reason for these things. They have great value. When a person goes out of their path, I guess the Life/God, whatever name we call, knows how to put us back on track, in out best interests. Some times shock treatments are necessary for our own well being. To jolt some one and put them back on the path. In order to remove a tumor, the doctors sometime cut open the body.
I don't regret the hardships that happened to me in life anymore (at least for now). I feel grateful that life made go through these bad (and good) events. Right now I am in a state to face life saying,"bring it on" --whether it be good,bad or neutral. Hope this perspective stays. It may not! But Life/God might send another correction message.
And I understand and empathize with your situation. I was also made busy by this traumatic event, due to which, I had to be there for the family and just deal with the enormity of the situation. I had to put my feelings (large part of thinking process itself) on hold and act. The situation demanded I act without my mind coming inbetween, to take care of what was needed at the time. Looking back, I don't know how I coped with the situation. It was definitely not me entirely. I simply did not had it in me to go through that event. I also felt that the world and every one in there empathized and helped me. I am grateful to everyone who were there at the time of my need. That was another lesson for me.... To be there for others when they go through a severe traumatic event like I did; or however I can contribute to the wellness of the all around me. There is a feeling of harmony, this is priceless. The event closed the gap between "me" and others. The event demanded, that I act like karma yogi. Somehow I did. That "somehow", I believe is divine guidance, which prepared me to face the event (even before it happened) and also channeled help through others.
Guess, there is an underlying reason for all events that happen. I can see with clarity, that what I perceived and labeled as bad events, caused the major turning points in my life, in positive ways.
--Ram |
Edited by - rkishan on Jan 01 2017 2:11:20 PM |
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts |
Posted - Jan 01 2017 : 2:44:36 PM
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| Peace be with you, Rkishan. The gratitude is shared. |
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Dogboy
USA
2197 Posts |
Posted - Jan 01 2017 : 5:10:21 PM
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quote:
I guess life has it's own way of teaching us. Few days after the event happened(was still on shock), I was asking "why?", "why now?", "why us?", fully knowing that there is no answer to the why questions. I see now, there is a reason for these things. They have great value. When a person goes out of their path, I guess the Life/God, whatever name we call, knows how to put us back on track, in out best interests. Some times shock treatments are necessary for our own well being. To jolt some one and put them back on the path. In order to remove a tumor, the doctors sometime cut open the body.
I too experienced an event that could have destroyed my marriage and split the family. Very fortunate for me my (then) year old practice got me through. At one time my body was deeply sobbing, but another part of me disconnected and observed my convulsing with a calm presence, very odd indeed! I was buffered from true suffering and GIY guided me through forgiveness and being a loving servant to salvage the pieces. Peace to you, brother, I hope your story unfolds as positively as mine currently is.
Keep on keeping on, all three eyes wide open.  |
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rkishan
USA
102 Posts |
Posted - Jan 04 2017 : 07:59:39 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Bodhi Tree
Peace be with you, Rkishan. The gratitude is shared.
Thanks to you and others, to read my long rant, and post kind replies.
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Edited by - rkishan on Jan 04 2017 08:01:16 AM |
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sunyata
USA
1507 Posts |
Posted - Jan 04 2017 : 08:52:31 AM
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